I heard this in the car the other day. No is a complete sentence.
Ahh, brilliant.
So I don’t have to say “No, you can’t have that and these are the fifteen reasons why and why not” ?
Oh, good. I’ll have to remember this. It is so much easier to say no, and walk away. But the little people, they follow you asking questions over and over again. “Why Mama?” And the littler people, they just scream at you and throw themselves to the ground and against the walls, and pound relentlessly until you’ve both got a headache.
It’s just so damn hard, this mothering thing. I don’t care what people say. The decisions get tougher as the kids get older. They are smarter and I’m getting stupider (see? “stupider”? SEE?).
More often than not I subscribe to the “No Sandwich.” I’m saying NO but I am trying really hard to make it sound pretty. As in, “That’s a great idea honey, but not right now. I don’t really feel like dragging your brothers in too, so maybe we could go this weekend.” Here’s the problem. One: I use the little boys as an excuse far too often – older kid will end up hating them for all the things he could never do because of them. Two: Older kid will undoubtedly say something to me in the near future that starts like this, “Mom, remember when you said…” And I’ll say, “Yes, honey, I remember that. But now it’s Tuesday and the weekend has already passed, and so we’ll have to go NEXT weekend.”
So even though the kid never forgets, he never remembers ON TIME, either. I guess I win that way, but it sure doesn’t feel like it. It feels like I’m constantly making excuses for things, and turning him down. But I like the word NO, dammit. I don’t mind telling my kids NO. I give them more than enough of Everything. Well, maybe not my time and patience, but everything else, I suppose. I think I just need to remember that No is a Complete Sentence. And leave it at that. I’m just so damn long-winded (got that from my dad), and mothers seem to feel this huge need to explain everything. But I vow to leave the promises behind and try this for the next week….
“Mom, can I have another cookie?”
NO
“Mom, can I use my own money and we can go in the toy store for just a few minutes, I want to see if they have….”
NO
“Mama, can I pleeeeeeeeeease get these fruit snacks. Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease?!”
NO
“Can I watch TV?”
NO
“Can I play the computer?”
NO
“Can I play the Wii?”
NO
“Can I play my Nintendo DS?”
NO
“What can I do? I’m so bored.”
NO
“Can you play a game with me?”
NO
“Can we read Fudge?”
Okay, sure. Go to the couch and I’ll be right there.
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
I know, I don’t always feel like justifying or explaining my NO, either. But I think if we don’t, then they figure it’s an arbitrary decision, not one with an actual reason. Which sometimes it is ;-)
LOL I love the end. We have to learn to say “no” as well as “yes.” It’s a fine line.