Happy New Year. Happy New Decade. Happy 2010. There are a few more hours of 2009 in my place in the world, and I am anxious to ring in the New Year. The kids are in bed, and I just peeked outside at the full moon. The second this month. How perfect. How rare. A blue moon on New Year’s Eve. To me this means second chances. Renewal. It means there are good things in store in the coming year. Things that rarely have happened before in my life. Better things. Even mystical things. Tonight, I am crossing the threshold [...]
Read More in Jen Writes, motherhood, three kidsDecember 2009
December 31, 2009
Blue Moon
December 30, 2009
(Be)longing
Was I lying when I wrote about not apologizing for my dreams? Because I haven’t been doing much to further those dreams lately. I have been composing only in my head. At night. Long after everyone else in the house is asleep. Or I have been jotting down notes on a legal pad between trips to the kitchen to do a dish, get a snack, refill a juice cup. But I have not been here. Here. At the computer, the porthole to the blog, at night, after the kids are asleep. I have not. Instead I have been with my [...]
Read More in Best of 2009, home, Jen Writes, Jen's Favorites, motherhood, relationship, three kids, writingDecember 29, 2009
The Life I Lead
I imagine a different life from time to time. I imagine a bank account with many zeroes. A larger house. Curtains that match. Walls that are painted with one swish of an arm. I imagine nooks and crannies elegantly decorated for comfort, inviting me to read a book with my children. Floor pillows I’ve had the time to sew. Meals homemade and nourishing–like my sister knows how to do. But it is a different life I lead right now. Rushed and harried. But not forever. And I am not alone. Some days are calm and flow with me. I can [...]
Read More in Best of 2009, Sarah Writes, Sarah's Favorites, three kidsDecember 28, 2009
Five for Fighting
There is so much fighting in this house that it makes me want to scream. No. It does make me scream. And then I’m only adding to the mess. Heightening it, actually. How are the children to learn self-discipline and composure when I’m flying off the handle? How are they to learn patience with sharing and learning when my husband has so little patience with them? It’s the same conundrum so many mothers face: I’m yelling at my kids to stop yelling. Oh the irony. The painful, not so simple, irony. And it just doesn’t seem to quit. No matter [...]
Read More in boys, Sarah Writes, three kidsDecember 27, 2009
A Christmas Wish Come True
I keep thinking about magic. It’s the time of year no doubt. The tales I tell of Santa and his sleigh. The songs we sing. The reindeer food that we’ll throw up to the roof on Christmas eve. The enchantment of gifts that will spill out from under the tree, delighting us all with their pretty papers and silky bows. It is magical. The spirit of giving. The charm of a season. The memories and traditions we are creating in this cozy house of ours. Despite all the stresses of money and time–how much to spend, what to give, when [...]
Read More in holidays, Sarah Writes, three kidsDecember 22, 2009
Ten things you may not know: The physical me
I have only one ovary (and one fallopian tube) All of my other internal organs are in tact (as far as I know) My lips are not my own (but once they were) My heart has been broken (and is stronger for it) I have never broken a bone (but I have seen Sarah’s arm in a cast) My skin is finicky and dry and cracked (so I apply lotion many times every day) My hair turned grey after my dad died (in a stripe down the center of my head) I have lines around my eyes (that I just [...]
Read More in Jen WritesDecember 17, 2009
Sleeping Beneath the Tree
Jen is right. It is the experiences of childhood that tell the tale of our youth as we get older and gain perspective about our upbringing. It is not only the opportunities that we are offered–soccer camps, slumber parties and piano lessons–or the material gifts that shower down upon us on Christmas and birthdays, but the experiences we share directly with our parents. The small stuff as much as the big. The time that is devoted to us individually. A one-on-one experience. An experience that is engineered to delight both child and parent. A moment to be shared, to be [...]
Read More in holidays, motherhood, Sarah WritesDecember 16, 2009
Priorities, Insecurities and Experiences
Maybe you’ve noticed it’s been a while since I wrote anything substantive. (Maybe that’s my ego talking and you haven’t noticed anything at all about me. That’s just the way it should be, actually.) Here’s the thing: The week of daring writing paralyzed me. All week I thought daring thoughts, walked out to the ends of every emotional gangplank in my psyche and ended up crying on Friday morning when my Sweetie called to ask if he should pick up coffee on his way home. So, no daring post from me. Perhaps it’s not the right time. Perhaps I was [...]
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Read More in Jen Writes, three kidsDecember 13, 2009
The Half-Drunk Winner Is?
Jen and I have read every entry. We have talked, emailed and Instant Messaged all week. We are awestruck. We are honored. Every one of our participants gave this community something brave and daring. Something that we, ourselves, found difficult to do. Time and time again we both came back to Kitch. Her words pummeled me with honesty and depth and heartache. With introspection and reflection alike. I am proud to name The Kitchen Witch as the winner of our Half-Drunk Challenge. But dare I say we all are winners? Dare I? Has it not been an amazing week? More [...]
Read More in Sarah Writes, three kidsDecember 13, 2009
Cast Your Ballot
Thank you. Just Really. Thank you. Jen and I are blown away by the response to the Half-Drunk Challenge. It was just another idea, you see. An idea that I threw out there. An idea that became, like Five for Ten, a self-sustaining means to new connections, and stronger connections–to a group of insightful people that choose, like us, to spend a great amount of time in the written world. My two littlest boys are snug in their beds for a midday nap. The oldest child plays games with his father. I finally have some time to cozy up in [...]
Read More in Sarah Writes, three kidsDecember 12, 2009
Fight For Me
“..and when you’re at work all day then you go out for beers or whatever else it is you do, and get home at 7 or 8 or 9, what am I doing? What am I doing while you’re out having all this fun?” “Being a mom.” “And?” silence.. Am I that one-dimensional? Is that all I am? A mom? Aren’t I also the woman you fell in love with? The woman who used to make you laugh? The woman with strong opinions and deep loyalty? I am mom, but I am also still that woman. Do you even see [...]
Read More in guest postDecember 12, 2009
My Husband is an Alien
I came home all dressed up after taking my oldest son, Brevitt, to The Nutcracker Suite with tickets bought at an auction while I still had money in my pocket. “Hummada hummada you look beautiful”, my husband, Wade, admiringly said and we lustfully stared into each other’s eyes. I felt our eyes start to smolder and spark as the signal that we were sending to each other to race upstairs and tear each other’s clothes off got crossed with the noise of our three boys playing a game of hit and tackle in the living room. Once again our lustful [...]
Read More in guest postDecember 12, 2009
Am I A Hottie?
Yes, I am a hottie but not in your typical, supermodel way. I am moderately thin in a voluptuous way with large hips and full breasts and wild, uncontrollably curly hair. I have been told that my eyes are as green as the Connecticut River, which is a murky sort of green and that my bee sting lips would have been more appreciated in the fifties. I remember I had an acquaintance once stop in the middle of a conversation we were having and say, “did you know that you are beautiful?” as if he had just discovered it that [...]
Read More in guest postDecember 11, 2009
Breakable
[Audio clip: view full post to listen] There are certain things my husband just will not do. It amazes me that he has the resolve to walk away so easily. To leave something undone. Without guilt. Without a second thought. To leave it in my hands. My hands that are already exhausted by all that needs doing in life. The chores, the tasks, the mountains of laundry. The wiping of noses, the tying of laces, the dressing, feeding, caretaking of my mommy life. I am exhausted by the mere thought of it all, let alone the execution. Exhausted by trying [...]
Read More in Best of 2009, chores, fatherhood, housework, motherhood, relationship, Sarah Writes, Sarah's Favorites, three kidsDecember 9, 2009
Men’s “Junk”
So what is it about penises, or a particular penis, that intrigues a woman, this woman? I am sure many men and most psychologists would say it is a power issue. When a woman has a man’s penis in her hands, or her mouth, she has a certain amount of power at her beck and call. A squeeze too tight, a nibble instead of a suck and he may wish he had never let her down there. On the other hand, or in the other cheek – pun intended – a woman holds a man’s penis, and if she is [...]
Read More in guest postDecember 8, 2009
Wanna be Momalomanonymous?
So, we have this idea. If you would like to participate in our Half-Drunk Challenge but you need an anonymous place to post, we can help. A few of you have said that you can’t write what you really want to write and publish it on your own blog. Too real. Too daring. Too something for your family, your friends, your own regular readers, you. Whatever your feelings, your reasons, your hesitations, we would like to help. So, if you want to participate but you don’t have a blog or don’t want to post your entry on your blog, please [...]
Read More in Jen Writes, three kidsDecember 8, 2009
Drunk Love – Song and Celebration
Excuse the typos. And the grammatical errors. And the nonsensicalness. But I? Am drunk. Most definitely so. Just wanted to impart two things tonite. In a silly way. And in a somewhat daring way. To keep the vibe of the challenge going. 1. Tonight, while being subjected to the Carrie Underwood special on television, my husband and I admitted to one another that we actually like the following song. Let me be clear: we are not country. However, after divulging that I freely sing along when I hear it, Dan chimed in that he’ll give way to robust sing-a-long also [...]
Read More in Best of 2009, relationship, Sarah Writes, Sarah's Favorites, three kidsDecember 7, 2009
Half-Drunk Challenge Entries
Join us. Drink. Be Merry. Write. Go here AND here for some info. Then LINK UP and join in the fun.
Read More in Sarah WritesDecember 7, 2009
A Few Clarifications About Our Half-Drunk Challenge and Some Ideas of How to Get Started
1. You DO NOT have to have a blog to take part in the Half-Drunk Challenge. If you would like to write something specifically for us, we would be honored. Write write away, submit your essay/story to one of us via e-mail, and we will take it from there. (See those nice little e-mail buttons over there to your right? Go.) 2. You DO NOT have to be drunk (or daring) all week. We are not promoting total annihilation of holiday responsibility. We are simply giving you a week to put together your most daring, bravest and, if you so [...]
Read More in Jen Writes, three kidsDecember 5, 2009
Half-Drunk Challenge
Play Me [Audio clip: view full post to listen] The morning I woke up hungover and remembered I had actually published a post entitled Drunken Rambling about my Optimistic Clitoris I decided to challenge as many readers as I could to write something daring. This particular post of mine was clearly the result of Nablopomo pressure, four Gin and Tonics, and a lack of any other ideas at the time. But I wondered what could happen if we actually PLANNED to get loose and write! So here we go. Start your engines. Get out the cabernet. This is a challenge [...]
Read More in Sarah Writes, three kidsDecember 4, 2009
Voila: C’est une gerbil triste
Here it is. The sad gerbil. Heartbreaking, isn’t it. The frown. Did the gerbil miss me while I was away at camp? Is the gerbil just a fill-in for Sarah? Did she miss me? I love this piece of notebook paper, so lovingly crafted into mixed-media artwork. The letters in bold marker and the attention-to-detail strokes of the crayon-colored gerbil fur. I love thinking about the time Sarah took to create this masterpiece. She was likely just 6 years old, as the rest of my gerbil-mentioning camp letters were from 1984. And here we are, 25 years later. And my [...]
Read More in history aka before kids, Jen Writes, three kidsI have two separate text documents on my computer filled with attempts at explaining my reaction to Jen’s post from yesterday. It’s important for me to respond to her even though I’ve been having some trouble finding all the words. She has spun a stimulating thread here. I have read and reread the insightful comments from our dedicated readers, and it is obvious that her words have inspired a wealth of thoughts and emotions about our roles as parents. How we foster independence in our children. How much or little we intervene with their choices. How accepting we are of [...]
Read More in motherhood, Sarah Writes, sisters, three kidsDecember 1, 2009
Why my kids have milk mustaches, skinned knees and chore charts
Out of necessity, I have given up a lot of control. A LOT. That’s what happens when you are outnumbered by your children. And your children’s needs. You have to let things go. And here’s what has happened since I stopped wiping faces after every meal or even caring if they’ve had three meals rather than eight snacks: I’ve come to believe that me giving up a certain amount of control of my kids is good for everyone. It takes the pressure off of me. And for the kids? They learn risk, responsibility, consequences. Also pride. And humility. But the [...]
Read More in Jen Writes, motherhood, three kids