Comments on: (Be)longing

By: Ten from Jen: Blog Posts of 2009 — Momalom

Ten from Jen: Blog Posts of 2009 — Momalom — Sun, 03 Jan 2010 18:31:09 +0000

[...] (Be)longing (It seems strange to link to a post that I just wrote last night, and yet this is the crux of it [...]

By: Bruce Steven Dolin

Bruce Steven Dolin — Sun, 03 Jan 2010 06:56:27 +0000

I too have so much writing that wants to be written, and at the same time so much parenting, loving and working that also wants full expression that it seems that something is always falling behind or left undone. I find comfort and solace in what you, and your readers say here… seeking community, expression, right balance, lives well lived, Selves more fully expressed. I have found a strange sort of freedom in blogging, not so self-conscious as “fiction” as we’ve been raised to write and read it, and yet great lubrication for the fiction that gestates within us. At forty-nine I feel like I am only just beginning to find a voice, to figure out what it is I’ve been meaning to say ever since pencil worked so clumsy over paper, so much slower than the words in my heart, back when I was a small child.

Here’s to a rich year of reading each other and writing for each other… and all our kids too. Namaste

By: lovenursing

lovenursing — Sat, 02 Jan 2010 08:33:57 +0000

I am in awe of this post.
Because I dream of being a mom but in my heart of hearts know I will not ever know the depths of motherhood until I get there, in my own time.
Balance is so hard to maintain sometimes, no?

By: Liz

Liz — Fri, 01 Jan 2010 17:02:20 +0000

Jen, I so know how you feel. I feel, so often, that I’ve completely abandoned my dreams of becoming a “real writer” simply due to the lack of time. Motherhood…it is all encompassing. Even when you have a partner who does half, if not more, of the load. Even when you work “reasonable” hours as a teacher. No matter what. It is so much EFFORT. I just turned 37. Not a big deal, but definitely on the other side, closer to 40. 40. When will I finally make it happen? When will I stop making excuses? When will I be able to say I gave it my All? I don’t know, but…blogging has helped. I do feel like I have an outlet. And I feel like I have a place to go be inspired, by other writers, by other women, by other people having the same experiences, or completely different ones. All of us sharing. I, too, am still not 100% comfortable with the term: blogger. I am a blogger. I blog. What is that, exactly? I still thinks it sounds (ahem) hokie. Hokie. But it doesn’t FEEL hokie. And so, I try to ignore the way the term makes me shift uncomfortably in my chair, and I post. And I read.

By: Momlissa

Momlissa — Fri, 01 Jan 2010 05:55:48 +0000

Thank you so much for such a beautiful and validating post. I find so much solace in knowing there is someone out there feeling exactly what I am, able to articulate it in such a succinct way. I often feel that due to working out side the home and having 3 small children, I do everything at 60% and it’s hard. Really hard. But it just is the way it has to be right now. And you get out of bed every day and do the best you can. ‘Cause that’s all you can do, really. Anyway, happy new year and thanks again for remind me how powerful words can be. ~Melissa

By: Kristen

Kristen — Fri, 01 Jan 2010 01:29:36 +0000

Jen, I have been thinking so much about your post from a few weeks back when you encouraged all of us to unplug and to tune in to the life happening in front of our eyes – and so I am very glad for this follow-up. I agree with you, and with the other commenters, that it is about balance, and doing what seems right, and trying to do something (one thing at least) correctly every once in awhile. I also think it is about forgiveness, allowing imperfection, going with feeling.

I will look forward to reading more of your words in the new year.

By: Lindsey

Lindsey — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 18:01:25 +0000

Yes, yes, yes … I think the challenge is to let go and have what we can do – what we can do with writing, with feeling, with every day – be enough right now. This is all we have, this right now, and when it’s gone we’ll miss it even if we have more time for the stuff we so ache to do more of now.
Right?
At least that’s what I tell myself.
xo

By: TheKitchenWitch

TheKitchenWitch — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 17:07:00 +0000

I know a lot of us struggle with this. I feel like I’m doing too much and yet doing nothing well. Torturous.

By: Corinne

Corinne — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 16:14:48 +0000

I read this last night, and have been thinking about it ever since. It’s the balance that’s so difficult, and hard to come by.
And the dependency. Oh the dependency… from little hands to words trying to rip across the page… the importance of both, but the priorities.
I hear you , lady, loud and clear.

By: Nicki

Nicki — Thu, 31 Dec 2009 12:24:35 +0000

I so understand what you are saying, Jenn, about the writing and this being good and doable and about the family time. Enjoy both!