Comments on: Five for Fighting http://momalom.com/2009/12/five-for-fighting/ Sisters | Life | Three Kids Tue, 07 Feb 2012 03:49:21 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.1.1 By: Sometimes you have to just let them fend for themselves — Momalom http://momalom.com/2009/12/five-for-fighting/comment-page-1/#comment-2608 Sometimes you have to just let them fend for themselves — Momalom Mon, 04 Jan 2010 11:05:34 +0000 http://momalom.com/?p=2245#comment-2608 [...] boredom. But sometimes you just have to let them fend for themselves. You have to let them fight, keeping an ear out for bloodshed but otherwise staying out of it. Sometimes you just have to make [...] [...] boredom. But sometimes you just have to let them fend for themselves. You have to let them fight, keeping an ear out for bloodshed but otherwise staying out of it. Sometimes you just have to make [...]

]]> By: Linda http://momalom.com/2009/12/five-for-fighting/comment-page-1/#comment-2604 Linda Sun, 03 Jan 2010 08:03:54 +0000 http://momalom.com/?p=2245#comment-2604 I know I'm late on commenting here, Sarah, but I want to thank you for this post and for the honesty in it. I feel like I felt when I finally told someone about my postpartum depression - relieved to find out someone else feels like me! I've been a parent for 14 1/2 years and I thought yelling was my family's big, dark secret, which sounds kind of dumb now that I'm thinking about it. Thanks for reminding me that I'm not alone. I know I’m late on commenting here, Sarah, but I want to thank you for this post and for the honesty in it. I feel like I felt when I finally told someone about my postpartum depression – relieved to find out someone else feels like me! I’ve been a parent for 14 1/2 years and I thought yelling was my family’s big, dark secret, which sounds kind of dumb now that I’m thinking about it. Thanks for reminding me that I’m not alone.

]]> By: Stone Fox http://momalom.com/2009/12/five-for-fighting/comment-page-1/#comment-2583 Stone Fox Fri, 01 Jan 2010 17:39:40 +0000 http://momalom.com/?p=2245#comment-2583 my sister has been an Early Childhood Educator for 15 years. some of the tricks she has shown me are priceless. this is my absolute favorite: in our house, yelling is strictly an outdoor activity. if there is yelling in the house, the offender is taken by the hand by a grown up and ushered outside immediately. no shoes, no coat. the rationale is that if the kid needs to yell that badly, we need to get outside as fast as we can. the only downside is that usually the adult is me and i usually only grab my own shoes, so i'm outside encouraging my kid to yell his head off while i freeze my butt off too. however, it works. the need to yell is seriously decreased when the only place you can do it is outside in -20 weather. this is a lesson kids will learn in 30 seconds or less if it's winter. my sister has been an Early Childhood Educator for 15 years. some of the tricks she has shown me are priceless. this is my absolute favorite: in our house, yelling is strictly an outdoor activity. if there is yelling in the house, the offender is taken by the hand by a grown up and ushered outside immediately. no shoes, no coat. the rationale is that if the kid needs to yell that badly, we need to get outside as fast as we can. the only downside is that usually the adult is me and i usually only grab my own shoes, so i’m outside encouraging my kid to yell his head off while i freeze my butt off too. however, it works. the need to yell is seriously decreased when the only place you can do it is outside in -20 weather. this is a lesson kids will learn in 30 seconds or less if it’s winter.

]]> By: becca http://momalom.com/2009/12/five-for-fighting/comment-page-1/#comment-2560 becca Thu, 31 Dec 2009 01:04:08 +0000 http://momalom.com/?p=2245#comment-2560 I'm late in this comment party but couldn't miss out because I'm with you. Right there next to you on this. I recently tweeted "Does screaming 'stop screaming!!!' lose its effectiveness when screamed?" I feel like I scream all day long. If not at someone then inside my head. I'm so tired of feeling frustrated and worn out and like NO ONE hears me. And then I wonder why Hannah screams at Luke. And why Luke screams instead of talking. I never was a screamer. I never wanted to be a yeller. But it's all I can do on some days. But do you know what I hate more? Bickering. I detest bickering. The quick back and forth of anger that never resolves anything and just leaves me incredibly annoyed. I don't scream at Tim in front of the kids but the bickering... it's worse. But there are the quieter days. The ones that I get through without a sore throat and bitterness inside my head. The days when we just all get along. And I remember why I love everyone so much. And i realize it's possible to do this job without screaming! I hope you've been jumping a lot in the freezing cold on your trampoline! I'm thinking of getting an indoor mini version... although it would probably just be one more thing for the kids to scream about. I’m late in this comment party but couldn’t miss out because I’m with you. Right there next to you on this. I recently tweeted “Does screaming ‘stop screaming!!!’ lose its effectiveness when screamed?” I feel like I scream all day long. If not at someone then inside my head. I’m so tired of feeling frustrated and worn out and like NO ONE hears me. And then I wonder why Hannah screams at Luke. And why Luke screams instead of talking. I never was a screamer. I never wanted to be a yeller. But it’s all I can do on some days.

But do you know what I hate more? Bickering. I detest bickering. The quick back and forth of anger that never resolves anything and just leaves me incredibly annoyed. I don’t scream at Tim in front of the kids but the bickering… it’s worse.

But there are the quieter days. The ones that I get through without a sore throat and bitterness inside my head. The days when we just all get along. And I remember why I love everyone so much. And i realize it’s possible to do this job without screaming!

I hope you’ve been jumping a lot in the freezing cold on your trampoline! I’m thinking of getting an indoor mini version… although it would probably just be one more thing for the kids to scream about.

]]> By: Boy Crazy (@claritychaos) http://momalom.com/2009/12/five-for-fighting/comment-page-1/#comment-2550 Boy Crazy (@claritychaos) Wed, 30 Dec 2009 03:45:54 +0000 http://momalom.com/?p=2245#comment-2550 As a mother of three boys myself, I hear you. I often say they fight as well as they play. And what is it about getting them outside? Tearing down those boundaries and those walls that bounce the echoes right back at us. Ugh. Just imagine when they're bigger. The wrestling, punching, all of it...I need to take it day by day or I'll freak out. As a mother of three boys myself, I hear you. I often say they fight as well as they play. And what is it about getting them outside? Tearing down those boundaries and those walls that bounce the echoes right back at us.

Ugh. Just imagine when they’re bigger. The wrestling, punching, all of it…I need to take it day by day or I’ll freak out.

]]> By: john cave osborne http://momalom.com/2009/12/five-for-fighting/comment-page-1/#comment-2546 john cave osborne Tue, 29 Dec 2009 21:55:48 +0000 http://momalom.com/?p=2245#comment-2546 three things here: 1. way to throw your hubby under the bus in first paragraph! 2. at least you took your own self down with him in the sentence before. 3. you are frightening the hell out of me. is this what i'm to expect 8 years from now? constant fighting? b/c right now we have constant fussing (oh, and a NASTY stomach bug that's making its rounds through my family like the ever-annoying "wave" circling the stadium during THE most crucial play of the game). and i gotta tell ya, since we're venting and all, i preached a bunch focus on the Goodness bullshit in a lot of my December posts, and while i meant it? Christmas brought me to my KNEES. and i wasn't praying. well, check that. i was often praying for the fussing to stop. all that said, had a great Christmas, and hope you did, too! by the way, remember the mirilax suggestion you gave me? my wife was SUPER hesitant b/c i got it from "Llama Mom, some chick on the internet" (she's not down w/ the whole cyber community). the problem persisted. and persisted. and persisted. she finally broke down and tried it. we're good to go. i knew you were a smart one, Llama Mom. (and thank you! for real!) God bless, my friend. Happy New Year! three things here:

1. way to throw your hubby under the bus in first paragraph!
2. at least you took your own self down with him in the sentence before.
3. you are frightening the hell out of me. is this what i’m to expect 8 years from now? constant fighting? b/c right now we have constant fussing (oh, and a NASTY stomach bug that’s making its rounds through my family like the ever-annoying “wave” circling the stadium during THE most crucial play of the game). and i gotta tell ya, since we’re venting and all, i preached a bunch focus on the Goodness bullshit in a lot of my December posts, and while i meant it? Christmas brought me to my KNEES. and i wasn’t praying. well, check that. i was often praying for the fussing to stop.

all that said, had a great Christmas, and hope you did, too! by the way, remember the mirilax suggestion you gave me? my wife was SUPER hesitant b/c i got it from “Llama Mom, some chick on the internet” (she’s not down w/ the whole cyber community). the problem persisted. and persisted. and persisted. she finally broke down and tried it.

we’re good to go. i knew you were a smart one, Llama Mom. (and thank you! for real!) God bless, my friend. Happy New Year!

]]> By: Sarah http://momalom.com/2009/12/five-for-fighting/comment-page-1/#comment-2545 Sarah Tue, 29 Dec 2009 21:04:21 +0000 http://momalom.com/?p=2245#comment-2545 Rebecca, You are so far from alone. And feeling these commonalities is why I choose to write here in this place. In public. About motherhood and life as I know it. It is exhausting: being on the brink. And I am there far too often. And there are so many days like today when I'm teetering on the edge of guilt and pleasure at escaping the fighting, yelling, whining, fighting, yelling, whining and coming to work. And on Saturday mornings when you look at the clock on the stove and it's only 9:30, just know I'm doing the SAME EXACT THING. Stove clock oh how I hate thee! Rebecca,
You are so far from alone. And feeling these commonalities is why I choose to write here in this place. In public. About motherhood and life as I know it.

It is exhausting: being on the brink. And I am there far too often. And there are so many days like today when I’m teetering on the edge of guilt and pleasure at escaping the fighting, yelling, whining, fighting, yelling, whining and coming to work.

And on Saturday mornings when you look at the clock on the stove and it’s only 9:30, just know I’m doing the SAME EXACT THING. Stove clock oh how I hate thee!

]]> By: The Life I Lead — Momalom http://momalom.com/2009/12/five-for-fighting/comment-page-1/#comment-2544 The Life I Lead — Momalom Tue, 29 Dec 2009 20:51:34 +0000 http://momalom.com/?p=2245#comment-2544 [...] moods are always changing. There is fighting on one day and sweet surrender on another. And I am strangely comfortable here. With knowing this [...] [...] moods are always changing. There is fighting on one day and sweet surrender on another. And I am strangely comfortable here. With knowing this [...]

]]> By: Nicki http://momalom.com/2009/12/five-for-fighting/comment-page-1/#comment-2543 Nicki Tue, 29 Dec 2009 15:37:32 +0000 http://momalom.com/?p=2245#comment-2543 Rebecca - I think the government can use you - three peace negotiations by 9:30 am. That is something to be proud of! Rebecca – I think the government can use you – three peace negotiations by 9:30 am. That is something to be proud of!

]]> By: Rebecca http://momalom.com/2009/12/five-for-fighting/comment-page-1/#comment-2542 Rebecca Tue, 29 Dec 2009 15:33:40 +0000 http://momalom.com/?p=2245#comment-2542 I loooooooove this post. I've felt this way so often in the past few weeks...with the excitement of school parties, playdates, snow, and Christmas coming, my children HAVE DRIVEN ME TO THE BRINK with their fighting, yelling, whining, fighting, yelling, whining. But it will pass and I try to remember that in ten or fifteen years, I'll miss the yelling, fighting, whining because they will be off living their lives somewhere. But I tend to forget this in the moment. Especially when I look at the clock on the stove and it is only 9:30 in the morning and I've already brokered three peace negotiations and issued one threat. Your post makes me know I'm not alone. Thanks:) I loooooooove this post. I’ve felt this way so often in the past few weeks…with the excitement of school parties, playdates, snow, and Christmas coming, my children HAVE DRIVEN ME TO THE BRINK with their fighting, yelling, whining, fighting, yelling, whining. But it will pass and I try to remember that in ten or fifteen years, I’ll miss the yelling, fighting, whining because they will be off living their lives somewhere. But I tend to forget this in the moment. Especially when I look at the clock on the stove and it is only 9:30 in the morning and I’ve already brokered three peace negotiations and issued one threat. Your post makes me know I’m not alone. Thanks:)

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