This morning on my drive into work, I happened upon an interview with scientist Stephen S. Hall. In talking about his new book Wisdom: From Philosophy to Science he used the term “emotional suppleness.” I didn’t hear much of what he said after that, because I just kept repeating those two words over and over to myself. Emotional suppleness. Emotional suppleness. I’ve written about my struggles for time, about wanting to be mindful of my children’s childhoods while also preparing them for adulthood, about the challenges of getting kids into bed, of keeping calm, of not wanting to be judged [...]
Read More in Jen Writes, mind/body, motherhood, three kids, writingMarch 2010
March 30, 2010
Emotional suppleness
March 29, 2010
the rainbows of my life
play me [Audio clip: view full post to listen] a rainbow bridges over my life i see myself beneath it i stand tall in the middle looking up and back and forth side to side the smile of my first-born son at one end the beginning of it all this life my existence my motherhood my heart pulled and pushed and twisted torn tattered tattooed i heave and sigh. so many thoughts and emotions. so much to do. even more to feel. i breathe quick and slow. heavy and hard. sometimes i forget i am breathing at all. and think [...]
Comments on this entry are closed
Read More in Sarah Writes, three kidsMarch 27, 2010
Mommy has a tattoo
I have a tattoo. Here’s a little visual for you. A photograph taken on my wedding day. In my white dress. In front of a lighthouse altar. My arm gently folded around my man’s broad hand. It was a sunny Cape Cod day full of promise, and new beginnings. Despite life’s fresh starts, we all are branded by the past. I am branded. This tattoo is the most obvious of examples. I cannot hide it. I cannot remove it. It drops beneath shirt sleeves, and peeks through pale, woven sweaters. It is boldly displayed in a tank top or (gasp!) [...]
Read More in motherhood, Sarah WritesMarch 26, 2010
Swap
Yesterday we hosted Kristen from Motherese, and today she’s hosting me! Due to a week of fevers, coughs, teething and other unexpected complications, I was left feeling less than able to compose something new. So, at Kristen’s brilliant suggestion, I went back to the archives, and I settled on a piece originally published last June. I could probably have written a post about how strange and somewhat uncomfortable it was to go back and reread my writing of a year. (Cringe.) Perhaps another day. Anyway, to read a little something about books and reading and why Sarah and I are [...]
Read More in Jen Writes, three kidsMarch 25, 2010
All Points Bulletin by Kristen @ Motherese
Today we’re happy to host Kristen from Motherese. I believe it was during our Five for Ten extravaganza in the Fall of 2009 that we first met Kristen. She had just recently started her blog and meandered over to Momalom; before you know it, she was part of this very well-established community of women, mothers, writers. Read, enjoy, comment, then visit her at mothereseblog.com to read a little more. It’s worth your time. All Points Bulletin I never lose things. I’ve never lost my keys, my wallet, or my cell phone. In seventh grade, I accidentally threw away my retainer [...]
Read More in guest postMarch 23, 2010
The Mommy Contest
We could also have titled this “Why We Think Moms Should Give Up a Little Control” but, that just doesn’t sound as catchy, does it? So, The Mommy Contest We don’t want to win the mommy contest You know the one The one where you have to be the smartest the calmest the one with the superhero costume in her purse the healthy snacks and the right answers to everything We spend so much time thinking and talking about what it is to be a mother Because the judgments come from every direction There are no clear answers anywhere And [...]
Read More in Jen Writes, motherhood, Sarah Writes, three kidsMarch 22, 2010
The evolution of parenting three kids
A very wise reader named Cathy recently emailed me during my dealings with a certain little liar we know. Cathy is a mom to three boys, like me, and had this to say about having three kids: Parenting my first is an experiment; I practice with my second; the third just seems natural. This sentence caught in my throat as I read it. It cleared the skies and lifted me up. It absolutely defines life with my three boys. Jamis gets the brunt of me. The crispy edges of my parenthood. The raw material, not yet performed. Everything with Max [...]
Read More in Favorites, Sarah Writes, three kidsMarch 18, 2010
This is My Life: Sunbathing
Don’t be alarmed. It is not ME who is sunbathing. But on this nice, sunny day, a dear member of the family enjoyed the day in the sun (after a thorough spin in the washing machine). Ah, spring.
Read More in Jen Writes, three kidsMarch 16, 2010
Liar Update: The Harvest
If you are new to the Liar Mini-Series you can catch up here: Part I – Need Some Advice Part II – Planting The Seed Part III – Cultivation Okay, so I was going to title this “Liar Conclusion,” but for some leeeetle reason, I don’t seem to think this will be the last time I’m dealing in lies and punishment. And let’s totally put aside the fact that there will be two other boys someday learning Mommy’s Big Lesson. By all accounts, many of you had it right when you proclaimed Jamis one smooth criminal. He’s smart and sweet [...]
Read More in oldest child, Sarah WritesMarch 15, 2010
Struggling for time
Loud music. And 23 minutes on the dinner timer. Means I have time to sit down at my computer for a moment. Should I be with the rest of the family? Together in the other room. Enjoying the loud music, even louder in there. I am torn. I can actually feel the internal pulling. The I Shoulds: Family. I should be enjoying this time with them. Dancing. Goofing around. Singing to loud music. Taking in their smiles and their little bodies moving freely. Against. The I Wants: Time. Time is what I want. Time to form a complete thought and [...]
Read More in home, Jen Writes, motherhood, three kids, writingMarch 13, 2010
Liar Update: Cultivation
I know, I know, this Liar Series is turning into quite a to-do. But here’s the truth: I need to write about this. I need to write about it here on the blog. I need your comments, insight and perspective. I am not shy one bit when it comes to telling you that my life is chaotic, I don’t know what the hell I am doing, and I love to hear suggestions and advice from others because, did you hear me, I DON’T KNOW WHAT I’M DOING AND I’M NOT GOING TO PRETEND THAT I DO. So, today’s update. I’m [...]
Read More in Sarah WritesMarch 12, 2010
Liar Update: Planting a Seed
I love the comments here. I love the community. I love that I can ask for advice and you all deliver. If you have no idea what I am talking about, you can catch up by reading yesterday’s post about my 7-year-old liar. I picked up the kids yesterday afternoon and proceeded with the day as usual. I wanted the conversation with my little liar to be one-on-one and uninterrupted, which meant postponing it until the little boys were in bed. However, I still intended to arm myself with some facts. While Jamis was doing homework in the living room, [...]
Read More in Sarah Writes, three kidsMarch 11, 2010
Need some advice
Okay, friends. Today’s post is not about pretty writing and aha! moments. I need some advice. Here are the details: On Monday afternoon I took the boys to the grocery store. There was a sale on Crayola products in the aisle of the frozen foods section. Go figure. In an effort to quiet the beasts, I tossed three items in the cart: some crayons, markers and colored pencils. Upon leaving the store my 7-year-old, Jamis, made a weak and false attempt at helping me load the groceries into the car. It was all so that he could just find and [...]
Read More in Sarah WritesMarch 9, 2010
Last Saturday
A family breakfast of crepes and scrambled eggs. Grapefruit and coffee. A walk to the library to return books and take out videos. Lunch together. A houseful of blankets washed and hung to dry on the clothesline, drooping from a winter of ice and snow. A bike ride for B, S and Sweetie; a long nap for E; and reading on the porch for me. Catching up with neighbors after months of a housebound season. PJs before dinner, which has been cooking all day in the Crock-Pot, filling the house with the aromas of Indian spices. *** I came to [...]
Read More in home, Jen Writes, motherhood, three kidsMarch 9, 2010
Make You Smile
Yesterday was a rough day. Today I want to wake up with a smile. There are a few more people I know who also deserve another reason to lift the corners of their lips. Happy Birthday to Becca! I wish you nothing but sugary sweetness on your special day, girl. To Wolfie! For your wit, charm and whimsy. I’ve got thimbles on for you today, BLW. And to Kitch. (sigh) You’re in my soul, sister. Play Me and Be Happy Because sometimes it really is that simple. [Audio clip: view full post to listen] (note: if you click anywhere, that [...]
Read More in Sarah WritesMarch 6, 2010
Spring Again
I am ready for Spring. I am ready for fresh and new and change and glee. Grass that greens under the soft, bare feet of my three boys. Sprinklers to chill us on the warm days and mist us on the hot ones. I am ready for bouncing through the air as if swept up with the breeze. I am ready to be unleashed. Unlocked. There are glimpses of it here and there in our mixed up, messy New England weather. And there are glimpses of the freedom that warmth and sunshine bring: walks to the playground that don’t require [...]
Read More in mind/body, Sarah Writes, three kidsMarch 3, 2010
MomalomDesigns
I’m sorry for the recent distance between us. And the fact that I haven’t even had the decency to return an email or swing by your blogs and leave a comment on the brilliant posts that you have labored over. The thing is, I’ve been entertaining another one of my passions: Design. Instead of taking the time to do a revamp of Momalom, I’ve kicked it up a notch and been spending time with another blog. That’s right, CK is the proud owner of a newly designed blog courtesy of patience, hard work and too many late nights (for the [...]
Read More in Sarah WritesMarch 2, 2010
Thanks for noticing me
So there I am, loading the kids into the truck. Tying balloons onto car seats so they make it home from the birthday party. Fastening buckles. Unwrapping Smarties and Dum Dums for the short ride to Geege’s house. Rearranging the bags in the front seat so there is room for me to sit and drive. Chattering to the kids. Answering their questions. Finding their sippy cups. As far as loading in goes, this is a successful venture. A car pulls up. A window rolls down. I catch it all in the corner of my eye. “Everything OK, Jen? You need [...]
Read More in Jen Writes, motherhood, three kids