I’ll be honest. I have a lot to say when I’m standing in the shower or driving in the car. Even, if you can imagine, while reading a Buzz Lightyear book to the little boys before bed–snuggled in between them, hunkered down on the bottom bunk, Ethan wedged into the space between the mattress and the wall, Max clutching his favorite blue blankie. My eyes see the words, my lips read the words, but I don’t hear the story. I hear my own thoughts. They tumble around and they are good. But the story ends and so with it my [...]
Read More in Sarah WritesAugust 2010
August 31, 2010
not sure what you call this–an update? talking it out?
August 27, 2010
Family dinner out at Joe’s Pizza.
Please bring us two ginger ales And one small glass of water That looks like a ginger ale Because this little one sitting here Wants everything her older siblings have. She can’t possibly wait three years. But I’m not ready for soda In the hands of my baby And so I thank you, waitress, For the glass with ice, straw That satisfies my toddler’s need. (And makes dinner out easier, too.)
Read More in Jen Writes, motherhood, three kids, youngest childAugust 24, 2010
Three in a bed
We sleep together A toddler between us And I am happy Her toes at my knees Your toes touching mine And I realize I am good at this now This parenting at night Better than I was when we were in so deep for so long The years of nights stretching out from the long days No guaranteed hours of quiet The resisting being needed The resentment of being needed And now together this rare night of a child between us I lay half asleep rubbing her back listening to you breathe and sigh And I think again I know [...]
Read More in Jen Writes, motherhood, relationship, sleep, three kids, youngest childAugust 22, 2010
“They store up liquids like a water tower.”
“In case we disappear for a few days. Ya know?” Sarah wrote this in an e-mail to me, in response to my continued amazement at the liquid intake of my son. She and I each have a child who consumes copious amounts of liquid. Juice cups are filled and refilled throughout the day. Thermoses are constantly on hand. And while I sincerely hope there is no correlation between their intake of apple juice and water now to the amount of alcohol they ingest in their teen years, it really is remarkable to witness. It’s also extremely irritating. No matter what, [...]
Read More in birthday, health, home, Jen Writes, middle child, mind/body, motherhood, oldest child, three kids, youngest childAugust 19, 2010
freedom under open skies !!!
Intentional Happiness Cape Cod Vacation Edition Sand worn by time and waves, so soft. Running into the blue, blue sky, fueled by sun and laughter. !!! Finding his sea legs, leaving the comfort of my lap. !!! Washing the sand away in an outdoor shower under an open sky. !!! Finding a heart-shaped rock, oh my boy, oh my heart. !!! please excuse the lack of !!! icons this week–it seems I need a bathing suit with pockets! What makes you • !!! = Intentional Happiness Check out more !!! at Bad Mommy Moments, and link up below. We’ll check [...]
Read More in !!!, Sarah WritesAugust 16, 2010
on the airplane: leaving and coming home again
She lays her head on the hard metal armrest, feels her back pulled and pushed in ways that are nowhere near comfortable. Her spine is wrapped around the bump between the seats. She cups her hands and rubs her face and tries to wash away this angst she feels. The coming and going in her life. Excitedly leaving the children and their messes behind. Anxiously anticipating her return to it all. To the comfort they bring her. To the comfort of knowing exactly who she is when she is at home, with them, with their messes. She closes her eyes [...]
Read More in Sarah WritesAugust 13, 2010
This Much I Know
We are close to the edge It feels dangerous, risky, too real The pit in my stomach, permanent For far too many weeks now Shows no signs of leaving me But I must not turn away I hang on, wanting closed eyes Except I must keep them open Because it is my job: mother To keep my family surviving, thriving So I peek over the edge. Step back. Breathe deeply. And believe.
Read More in home, Jen Writes, three kidsAugust 11, 2010
The Curse
The story told in this song speaks to me in ways so personal I’m not comfortable writing about it here. And while I’ve shared the gospel of Josh Ritter before, a part of me is compelled to again offer his lyrics and music and, this time, a gorgeous video. I hope there’s something here for you, too.
Read More in Jen Writes, relationshipAugust 9, 2010
enough
what i want to write is this: I AM ENOUGH but this is how i feel: i’m afraid i’ll never write another decent stream of words in my life i’m afraid i’ll never be able to hang on to the feeling of calm that a kickass conversation with a close friend brings i’m afraid i’ll get lost in the dirty, boring details–the laundry, the bills, the organizing, scheduling, remembering of life i’m afraid i’ll lose track of where i am and where i wanted to be and all that will remain is a washed-up woman with three children and a [...]
Read More in Sarah Writes, three kidsAugust 5, 2010
10 things I really can’t come to terms with
10. My body image 9. My children fighting 8. The 3-foot radius of pee around the toilet 7. Grocery shopping–how I loathe thee 6. The fact that our dog is in HEAT–ew! 5. Having zero time to wake.up.alone and adjust to the day and sip my coffee and take a deep breath UNLESS I get up before the kids at 5 am. But then how would I get in the me-time the night before, when I stay up too late cause I don’t want to go to bed cause I don’t want the day to start all over again with [...]
Read More in !!!, Sarah WritesAugust 2, 2010
A Successful Vacation
Today is Monday. Last Monday I was at the “big” library, scouring the shelves for new audiobooks for my big boy. Choosing my “baby’s” first book to be taken out. Advising my 4-year-old on which Madeleine video to select. It was a warm and sunny summer day. Perfect for a trip downtown. A smoothie. A day of whim. For 10 days I enjoyed such whim. I got out of bed—one day early, one day late, the rest at the usual time—and faced each day with no grand plans. It was a vacation in the true sense of the word. Except [...]
Read More in home, Jen Writes, motherhood, three kids, three kids (six kids)August 1, 2010
Budget Shopping
I am a pro at stretching a dollar, scrimping on the grocery bill, making dinner out of what’s in the cabinets. We wear hand-me overs, hand-me downs and last year’s pants, calling them capris. But sometimes it’s nice to go on a shopping spree. So yesterday, the kids and I hit the dollar store for a few needs and wants. We found something for everyone: 1 hairbrush 1 fabric headband 1 rubber ball 2 hair clips 4 barrettes 4 plastic fighter jets 5 bungee cords 6 sponges 90 miniature Army men Total cost: $10.63 My hair is brushed and out [...]
Read More in Jen Writes, motherhood, three kids