Sarah writes

November 20, 2012

this just makes me feel good

“On Top of the World” by Imagine Dragons If you love somebody Better tell them while they’re here ’cause They just may run away from you You’ll never know what went well Then again it just depends on How long of time is left for you I’ve had the highest mountains I’ve had the deepest rivers You can have it all but life keeps moving Now take it in but don’t look down ‘Cause I’m on top of the world, ‘ay I’m on top of the world, ‘ay Waiting on this for a while now Paying my dues to the […]

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Sarah writes

November 18, 2012

riding the escalator

                      I don’t know what I’m doing In motherhood, wifehood, other I ride up and down and hip hop from one scale to the next Nothing gives me answers I’ve even come to forget the questions Not unlike my teens and 20s, I feel all I do is ride Which way I go is irrelevant I’ll eventually end up at the other end I should let go of expectations Not worry so much Ease up, lay back, enjoy the ride After all, it’s too short no matter how long it […]

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Sarah writes

November 13, 2012

tuning in

I’m stirring the risotto. Stir, stir, add stock, stir. Max appears in the doorway. “Mom, can you teach me how to play the guitar?” “I’ve been meaning to learn myself, buddy. Maybe we can learn together.” “Will GG teach us?” “Sure, yeah.” He strums for a while, singing. Stir, stir, add stock, stir. “Mom, I got so many songs in my head for when I grow up and go on American Idol that I just can’t decide which one. Like Baby, Don’t Let me Go and Snow Is Falling. Just so many. So, so many…” Stir, stir, clutch my heart, […]

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Sarah writes

November 3, 2012

lucky

I sat down to write. And then I looked up. There is a white board above my desk. On it was a message, this message: I don’t know if I’m supposed to be the clover or if he is. Either way, this is fact. We are lucky clovers. Tweet

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Sarah writes

November 1, 2012

conclusions

I had a spat with my husband two mornings ago. He was dissatisfied with my response to a work matter he was recounting. I found myself sitting in the middle of the spat absolutely irritated by his reaction to my reaction and yet logically concluding that I ought to be grateful. He cares what I think about the man that he chooses to be when he is not with me. Cool. I have also concluded that no matter how many inches I lose off my hips and my butt and my thighs, my middle will still sag and bubble over […]

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Sarah writes

August 16, 2012

growing up

It’s happening, I think to myself. Here I am doing the dishes. Just doing them. Not scowling. Not resentful. Just doing. Oh my, I’m finally growing up aren’t I? This was me a few days ago. I stood at the sink, my shirt a little damp along the bottom hem, a pot in my hands and a sponge brush at the ready. My life–my head, my heart, my reason–has been shifting over the past 2 years or so. I’ve finally come to a place where I can see it all clearly. I see a woman who’s been going through the […]

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Sarah writes

May 29, 2012

Here with them

I’m ready for school to end. I’m not dreading the summer. I’m not wondering WHAT ON EARTH ARE WE GOING TO DO ALL DAY LONG, EVERY DAY. I’m not counting down the days of relative quiet that I have left but the the number of days until we are all free. Free to be, to loll, to dig, to swim. Free to eat whenever, wherever we like. Free to read or run. Free to drive to the lake or camp in the yard. This is unexpected. This is not me. This is not me at all. I battle selfishness like […]

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Sarah writes

May 11, 2012

Five for Five Round-Up

Five for Five was totally exhilarating. We read until our eyes were bleary, commented until our fingers went numb. Yes, it was almost that dramatic, and we really had a blast doing it. I’m feeling so energized. I’m feeling so alive! Hosting the writing series again forced me to come back to Momalom. On the very first day I realized that I have missed this space quite a lot. I don’t plan on leaving again any time soon. ______________ Jen and I would love to share with you some of the phenomenal posts we read from last week. I am […]

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Sarah writes

May 1, 2012

Double Rainbow

Maybe I just crumble when I reach this level of stress. Maybe I’m just not made for it. Maybe the fact that I’m prone to extremes impedes my ability to handle anything at all when I’m stressed as much as I am right now. Life has tides. I get that. I get the up and I get the down and I get the static–I’m always grateful for the static–but still, it wears a woman out to be moving around so much. Can life be blurry and clear at the same time? I took about a year to figure myself out […]

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Sarah writes

April 24, 2012

Words

Today I’m joining my dear friend Heather of the EO, for a little Just Write. It’s the freewrite, people; get your flow on. Words. They change our lives. In every way. Their sound. Their meaning. We introduce them every day to our children. Starting from the day they were born and ending…when? Perhaps never. We flood them with words, and expect them to pick up the pieces and talk to us like they know what they’re saying. Talk so we can understand them. Talk so they become a part of our world. I took summertime walks to the soccer fields […]

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Sarah writes

April 23, 2012

Change

Welcome to Five for Five — Day One! Yesterday I learned of some very unmannerly behavior my 9-year-old exhibited while at a friend’s house. It was embarrassing. And then my nearly 4-year-old slapped me in the face because he didn’t want to take a nap. It made me blood-boiling mad. A regular, old day here in Sarah’s world. Nothing special. Just the type of challenges you’d expect out of parenthood. It may have been a typical scene round these parts, but it doesn’t take too much to tip me into despair these days. The kind of despair that puts me […]

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Sarah writes

April 19, 2012

Five for Five! Topics revealed. (Finally!)

I’m saving all of my creative spark for next week: FIVE FOR FIVE. Today, it’s just the facts, ma’am. The topics for Five for Five are: Monday: CHANGE Tuesday: WORDS Wednesday: PICTURES Thursday: AGE Friday: LISTENING Are you entirely confused, because you have no idea what Five for Five is? Oops. Sorry. The facts: Five for Five is a community event for bloggers (you!). It’s simple to participate. Read. Comment. Write. Link up. We will do the same. 1. Read. Come to Momalom every day and read our post. 2. Comment. On the Momalom post you’ve just read. 3. Write […]

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Sarah writes

April 12, 2012

thursdays

Sometimes I think if I could just sit in one place long enough, I could find that kind of lasting happiness that pulls a mother through another dreary Thursday. By Thursday of every week I am tapped out. I have nothing left. Thursday afternoons find me turning my head when the boys do wrong, and, instead of doling out punishment or planning dinner, I’m curling up in bed wishing, praying, and seeking some silence. I’m touching the pillow, and searching for a moment I can settle into. A moment where I can feel resolution seeping in–through my eyelashes and my […]

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Sarah writes

February 14, 2012

I Love

Subconsciously I must have been aware I’d wake up to Valentine’s Day. But at the time I wasn’t thinking about that, even though I’d (finally) just coaxed two of the boys to address and package their class Valentines. I climbed into bed beside my husband who, for the first time in forever, was reading a book. The Hunger Games, if you must know, because I’d been hyping it up as a guilty pleasure to everyone I know. Of course, he downloaded it to my Nook, leaving me to either start a new book or dip into an old one I […]

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Sarah writes

January 6, 2012

creative lushness

Jen and I have often talked about creativity. How it is a blessing and a curse. Our daily lives consist of those daily-type things. You all know them well. They bring you up and they bring you down and then you find a way to just plateau and get them done. But creativity always seems to work itself into the day somehow. Not being creative, exactly, but having creative ideas. And no where to put them. Because there is no time for that in the daily grind, the plateau is easier than managing the ups and downs while fitting in […]

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Sarah writes

November 27, 2011

holidays are here

It’s here. The season of giving. The jolly and cheer. What do you most wish for this year? What do you most wish to give?   Tweet

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Sarah writes

November 26, 2011

effort

We talk a lot about effort in this house. And attitude. Body language and doing the best you can do and supporting those around you and having good cheer. I defined “oblige” last night during a bedtime read. I’m exhausted from the conversations, to be honest. But the irony is not lost on me, oh no. If I gave up on the lesson because it got too hard or too frustrating or I felt like I was constantly running backward, what kind of example would I be? He’s only 9 and I’m daunted. It gets harder as they get older. […]

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Jen writes

November 24, 2011

Happy Thanksgiving!

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Sarah writes

November 22, 2011

little pauses

In early Autumn my son had a soccer tournament. Day 2 found me alone on the sidelines, no little boys in tow pulling my eyes away from the field and my chatter away from the relatively adult conversation that can happen between players’ parents. It was a glorious weekend. The kind of pervasive sunshine that sneaks up on you, burning the gap of skin between your hairline and your collar. The boys had played three out of their four scheduled games. During the break between games we moved our chairs into the shade, doling out Gatorade bottles, and passing high […]

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Sarah writes

November 16, 2011

new moments

There are all these new moments in my life. They come rushing in. When I least expect it. That’s what “moments” do best, right? My heart swells in the after-thought. Remembering what just occurred. Remembering, only seconds later, that he said this and I thought that and wow. Just wow. My 9-year-old is growing up. He has his own sense of humor. He’s getting to know his parents so well. How we’re quirky. How we are when we don’t have to be parenting, parenting, parenting his little brothers. How we are real people. People he might just want to spend […]

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Sarah writes

November 15, 2011

once eyes

When Dan and I were dating and we lived in Florida and life was really, quite literally, one day at a time, I overheard him talking to his Mom one day. He was sitting on the stairs in our duplex. An apartment I shared with three dudes. The stairs were carpeted and covered in dog hair from the two pit bulls who resided with us. Dan said to his mom: “A girl with the most beautiful blue eyes.” And he winked at me. And he smiled. I smiled back in a blush-y kind of way and then turned away. I […]

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Sarah writes

November 7, 2011

halvsies

Max, do you want your sandwich cut in half? No. Places sandwich on butcher block table and illustrates with large chef’s knife. In half this way? Or diagonal? I don’t want it cut. You want it whole? YES! Pause. Older brother has something to say. (Because when doesn’t he, really?): Max, I like mine cut in half. Ironically it makes me eat faster. Jamis, did you just say “ironically”? Yeah. Why? Oh, I don’t know, because you’re NINE and you used it CORRECTLY! And also, so very many things go faster when you break them in two. Go smoother when […]

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Sarah writes

November 6, 2011

the dark

We were without power for seven days. 7. Seven. SEVEN! When my husband texted me last night I was in disbelief. “We Have Power!!!!” And then I called him. And he was giddy. And I knew it was true. But I wasn’t surely sure about it until we drove home and I saw the streetlamp and the stoplight just a few houses from ours. 50% of our town is still without. I’m feeling a bit guilty for being one of the ones who is not currently sitting in the dark, charging phones in the car, dealing with ashes and soot, […]

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Sarah writes

October 11, 2011

Just Writing

I’m at the end of it all. The end of my rope. My patience. My compassion. And yet I’m not really, am I? I never really am. There’s always more to give. More to have. More to be. There’s an index card taped to a window pane in my office that reads “No More Mediocre.” And I’m really trying. Really trying very hard to inject those three words into my every day. The more that I give and have and am. There’s another quote posted on my monitor. “No one can do everything, but everyone can do something.” So while […]

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Sarah writes

May 18, 2011

The New Face of Momalom

My heart wants to come back to writing in this space. So I decided what better way to motivate myself than to redesign our site! I’m having a hard time not feeling guilty about all the hours I’ve spent on quirky little style details. Hours I should be spending on any number of other tasks. Guilt can be both motivating and detrimental, don’t you think? In the end, I’ve chugged along and gotten us a good start. There will be more to come. More design, more words. But for now I just want to say one thing: Writing is a […]

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Sarah writes

May 10, 2011

I Remember

        I remember sleeping on my stomach, my arm in a cast and tied to the slats of the crib. I remember the dark-light red-black sky just moments before the tornado touched down. I remember bee-bop-a-loo-bop and ram-a-lama-dang in the car with my mother, playing with sounds and words and losing ourselves in song and harmony. I remember doing him and having it be done. I remember the green glass jug lamp filled with pennies. I remember imagining what it’d sound like to smash it. I remember the note he slipped under my door, folded in half, […]

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Jen writes

April 24, 2011

Happy Birthday, GG!

This year, GG’s birthday falls on Easter, which for me means that I’ve been spending my time cleaning the house in preparation for the Easter Bunny’s arrival instead of writing a birthday post for her, which I would have liked to do. But last year, Sarah wrote the following, and it’s one of her best. Happy Birthday, Mom! A couple of generations ago a baby girl was born. Her parents named her Gail. She grew and grew and welcomed five brothers and sisters to her tribe. Eventually, her siblings dubbed her “sister-mother” and joked that her daughterly perfection was the […]

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Deeeep Breath. Life is good. It’s messy and I’m anxious and there are no plans to which we can stick on any given day because we’ve got three loud-spoken, independent kids who push us and themselves beyond where limits should be. But, in all, life is good. And? It’s actually better when messy. I have to keep reminding myself of that last part. I’ve become very fond of clean and neat and orderly. I’ve stripped our life down and don’t mind so much the empty spaces. The corners of the living room that have no purpose yet? I’m okay with […]

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Sarah writes

March 31, 2011

a spark

I am strong. And my body wants to move. My legs remember the pace even when my heart struggles to keep up. But time sucks it all away from me. The memory of feeling good in movement so easily faded. So easily swept up in the haze of all that I was before: inert. There was a time. A time when I found the will. And I achieved great things. And I felt great in many ways. And then as slowly as it crept up it disappeared again. And I was sucked back into time. Sure, there are hints and […]

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Sarah writes

March 7, 2011

Be You

My little boys take turns playing with my iPhone as I try to watch the game. My biggest boy is on the field, in the goal–catching, punting, scrambling to keep the ball out of the back of the net. Each save piques my adrenaline and, I’m sure, his. How did I raise such a remarkably composed 8-year-old boy? One who has learned to walk away from both winning and losing with pride and grace. He has become a fighter despite himself, despite his inclination to fold up when things get hard. Looks like he’s shaping up to be not so […]

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Sarah writes

February 24, 2011

noone should ever feel alone

My big boy J is 8. For weeks he’s been hinting that he doesn’t want to sleep alone anymore. After a long, hard day last week I relented and let him sleep in my bed with his dad. I snuggled up in his twin size bed, happy for a room of my own. No dog, no husband grumbling that I stole the blankets again. No chance of little feet crawling over my head at 12 am or 3 am or 5 am. In mentioning it again to my husband the other night, in talking it through, I figured out something […]

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Sarah writes

February 16, 2011

This Is My Life: Messy!

My bedroom has been a disaster for weeks. Months? It’s the last place I get to in the house. Everything ends up there. EVERY THING. I have this habit of cleaning an area and putting all of the odds and ends that don’t belong there in a bag or a box or a bin of some sort–one designated for the basement, one for the upstairs. I fill up these receptacles and relocate them to a more appropriate area, but never actually do the job of sorting the random items back to their homes. You know, the toys and books and […]

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Sarah writes

February 11, 2011

changes

Max woke up a two nights ago around midnight. He climbed down from the top bunk, shuffled past the vacuum cleaner just outside his bedroom, and stepped over the cord looped across the floor. He went into the bathroom and stood in front of the toilet and tried his hardest to extricate his limbs from his footie pajamas. Well, poor kid, he just couldn’t do it. He peed in his jammies. Right there in front of the potty. He soaked himself through and through. I woke up to his whimpery whines and the sound of a zipper. I had been […]

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Sarah writes

November 27, 2010

Unintentional Makeover

We arrived home late this morning from my mama’s house. After a couple of glorious days doing nothing but lounging and eating, eating and lounging, I had decided on the ride home that I would finally repaint the living room. We’ve lived in this house for 2.5 years and nearly every room has been painted except the one in which we spend the most time as a family. I never hung pictures on the walls because I always intended to paint. The weeks turned to months turned to years and now here we are, living out of a room that […]

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Sarah writes

November 23, 2010

clarity-chaos

There are so many words in my head right now but it is too late to make sense of any of them. So, all I am going to say is this: Read Elizabeth’s Disclaimer. Go now. It is brilliant and beautiful and honest and real. So, so real. Maybe I’ll have something more Sarah for you tomorrow. Maybe if I disciplined myself to write at 8 am instead of 8 pm I could figure out which words to put down on the page to explain how I’m feeling right now, or what I’m thinking. Unfortunately, the hours between 4 and […]

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Sarah writes

November 21, 2010

waking up slowly

I don’t want to be awake, I think. I don’t want to roll out of bed. It’s so warm in here, so cold out there. The weight of the blankets fills in all the gaps that already are starting to form. The gaps in my day. The things I’ll forget to do. The things I’ll wish I had done. The things I’ve intended to do, but couldn’t get to. Yeah, those gaps. But also the gaps in my heart where a small part of me wishes that the children weren’t here. That I could rouse myself slowly, like the sun, […]

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Sarah writes

November 19, 2010

This is my life: Screaming

My children bring out the worst in me as often as they bring out the best in me. I screamed so loud tonight that my throat hurts. And, although I’m sick to my stomach with guilt and sadness and fear that there really isn’t any other way to get them to listen and follow my directions, I also believe I’m not alone in unleashing my inner demon. As I said to my best friend today, I have finally come to a point in my life where I can say with some certainty that most people have the same struggles as […]

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Sarah writes

November 17, 2010

sometimes control isn’t such a bad word

don’t let your pain determine your actions. rise above it don’t let your frustration don’t let your desire determine your actions rise above it take back control ********** I’m trying really really hard to live by these words. In my role as mother, yes. But also in my role as mere human. How difficult it is to not allow our frustrations with ourselves and others determine how hard we fight or how quickly we retreat in the face of life’s challenges. How difficult it is to put aside our wishes and wants and do what is right and just and […]

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Sarah writes

November 14, 2010

Our baby days are almost over

Okay, they’re not almost over. They’re over. I’m a little weepy. It’s true. (Will there be one more? Nobody knows.) But instead of calling them babies, now I just call them beautiful boys. My boys. My brood. And we’ve got many more days ahead. There’s a place where boyhood begins–with sticks and mud and hitting your brothers–but I’m not sure it ever ends. So there’s always that to think of when I get sad for chubby feet and soft knees: raising an eternity of adventurous boys. Tweet

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Sarah writes

November 12, 2010

Inspire

Inspire them to be more than they ever think they can be Without wishing them to be perfect Without wasting time on their mistakes Without speaking lectures to deaf ears Inspire them to understand that love is all that matters over time that hope is lubricant for worry that voices are meant to sing that nothing ever takes their place These children, your lifeblood, your gift *** Six Word Fridays with Making Things Up Tweet

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Sarah writes

November 10, 2010

the details

UPS showed up. Stella barked. Jamis came home from school a mere three minutes later. Stella barked again. The result, of course, was two packages, a chatty 8-year-old, and a 3-year-old woken from his nap too soon. I heard the rumbling sounds of a rousing toddler and then the creak of the door opening wide. There was a pause, just long enough for me to wonder if I’d imagined the sounds from the second floor, but then he appeared. With blankie and doggie clutched tight, Max thumped down the stairs on his tush, one step at a time. He sat […]

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Sarah writes

November 8, 2010

Life is kicking my ass

Life is kicking my ass. The list of shit I have to accomplish grows longer and longer. The daily chores keep adding up. Crap I should have done yesterday mingles with crap I have to do today pushes up against crap I’m worried getting done tomorrow. I’m juggling too many balls and there’s not enough air to keep them all floating. Gravity is working against me. I cannot see the sky for all the bullet points on my list filling the space in my head, blinding my eyes, sweeping the sun from view. I cannot THINK. I cannot think CLEARLY. […]

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Sarah writes

November 4, 2010

Autumnal !!!

I watch my children bounce they fall through leaves I join them and we all fall hard • I give in to their joy knowing that it is contagious and without them I wouldn’t have such love in my heart The days are short, now Now that I’ve shifted my priorities Now that I’ve realigned my heart Now that I know all I want is them and that everything else will come with time because some day though there will be more of them to love there will be less time with them to show it They wrestle and tackle […]

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Sarah writes

November 2, 2010

drifting

I’m laying on the couch reading a book. My body shakes with dry tears at the last paragraph of Chapter Nineteen: a mother/daughter embrace wrapped up with the meaning of family and gratitude. My skin is cold. My arms a little too cold sticking out of this skimpy pale pink tank top. In between page flips I think I ought to find a blanket, but I don’t. I don’t want to get up from my book. I don’t want to break the silence I am steadily forcing into my day. The peace I so desperately need. The words of this […]

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Sarah writes

October 27, 2010

kind of a big deal — to me, at least

Max wanted to cuddle last night actually, he really just wanted to postpone bedtime but he did have a fever so I guess he was justified in his request :) justified? geez, he’s a kid, three years old, and he wanted to cuddle he’s doesn’t need to be justified yeah, that’s exactly what I thought after I rolled my eyes so I took a break from the room for about 5 minutes to give him time to settle and then I returned and I cuddled and he squirmed it wasn’t all mushy mushy like you’d think I was on the […]

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Sarah writes

October 14, 2010

Ordinary Stories

Monday night I took my husband out for a big, happy birthday dinner. He had a hunk of meat. We shared a Caesar salad and creamed spinach, delicately sliced potatoes slathered with cheese and topped with chives. We shared conversation about jobs, friends, kids, age, and all things home. It seemed to go on forever. In a good way. I have this habit of chatting with the waitstaff when we are out to eat. Bartenders, usually, as they tend to have more time to chat and conversation is part of their job requirement. I should know. I was one once. […]

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Sarah writes

October 5, 2010

just a piece of this journey

I’m starting to take this mothering thing a little more seriously. Not sure where I’ve been for the last 2-3 years. In a haze. A really big bubble of a haze. I attest it to having Max and Ethan a mere 15 months apart. And moving into a new house. And focusing on the new business that supports our family. And, well, just surviving. Which we have. We’ve survived. We’ve done okay. I’ve done okay. But it ends there. I’ve been just doing okay for a little too long now. Pushing meals out of my kitchen that no kid should […]

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Sarah writes

October 2, 2010

broken bone, open heart

Wednesday night I poured myself a bowl of Special K for dinner–elegant, I know. I glanced out the window of the kitchen. I cut a bagel and put it in the toaster. I poured soy milk in the bowl. There was a scream from the trampoline. I put the milk away. There was another scream. I know it sounds strange but it wasn’t the strong, steady scream that usually comes from my kids. It was on and off, up and down, and it made my ears perk up even more than usual. I walked outside with my bowl of cereal, […]

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On Friday I sent a text message to a dear friend: Taking a personality quiz about my religious and spiritual beliefs. To give me an idea of what I believe. The questions are hard, yo. And she wrote: Ha. You really need someone else to tell you what you believe? I had to think about that for a moment. Is it ridiculous that I’m turning outward for answers? Answers that are obviously only found within? No. But I need to be asked these questions, I think. Might help me figure some shit out. The one who knows exactly what she […]

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Sarah writes

September 22, 2010

boys with sticks

I’ve been so fuzzy lately. Brilliant thoughts swarming through my head but my hands helpless to reach out and grab them. I often think I need to find a place of peace. A temple to call my own. A community to join. The discipline to sit and meditate. The fortitude to find my way onto the path and stop stumbling at the edge. Life is blistering. Imperfect. Surreal. It gets me down. Trips me up. Makes me cry. Confuses me. Distracts me. Life. *** But then I see this and know that even if I’m stumbling, they are Right as […]

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Sarah writes

September 8, 2010

I lost my internal compass again

It’s happening. That summer ending thing. That school starting thing. Those new beginnings. Time presses on and I stumble to catch up. Every season. I’m looking through pictures of my boys. Of summer. I’m nostalgic before a season has even completely passed. How can this be? The pictures arm me with goodness and light. They shower me with feelings of happiness and erase that sinking feeling of guilt that I am failing them, that I don’t enjoy them enough, that I’m not appreciating how quickly it all passes. I’m stuck in between the seasons. The sun still beating down and […]

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Sarah writes

September 2, 2010

I never get flowers

I’m not sure if she planned to send me flowers once her site was complete, but she did. The doorbell rings and the dog barks and I look out the glass door at a scruffy dude holding a small, green vase of brilliantly colored flowers. I assume he has the wrong house. “You got the wrong house,” I say. He scrutinizes a crumpled piece of paper and says, “Number 48?” I nod. I look puzzled. He plucks the card from it’s spiky, plastic holder. I open the seal and read the words. I nod again. I sign. I go inside. […]

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Sarah writes

September 1, 2010

Go Visit Christine

Please go visit my lovely friend Christine over at Coffees and Commutes! We launched her new site today and I am happy to have given her a fresh new space to call home. I’ve had the privilege of meeting and spending some time with Christine and I can honestly say that she has a heart filled with love, and words that are just waiting to reach out and grab us. It has been an honor working with her to create this new site. We have a few things to finish up but we were excited to go live with the […]

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I’ll be honest. I have a lot to say when I’m standing in the shower or driving in the car. Even, if you can imagine, while reading a Buzz Lightyear book to the little boys before bed–snuggled in between them, hunkered down on the bottom bunk, Ethan wedged into the space between the mattress and the wall, Max clutching his favorite blue blankie. My eyes see the words, my lips read the words, but I don’t hear the story. I hear my own thoughts. They tumble around and they are good. But the story ends and so with it my […]

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Sarah writes

August 19, 2010

freedom under open skies !!!

Intentional Happiness Cape Cod Vacation Edition Sand worn by time and waves, so soft. Running into the blue, blue sky, fueled by sun and laughter. !!! Finding his sea legs, leaving the comfort of my lap. !!! Washing the sand away in an outdoor shower under an open sky. !!! Finding a heart-shaped rock, oh my boy, oh my heart. !!! please excuse the lack of !!! icons this week–it seems I need a bathing suit with pockets! What makes you • !!! = Intentional Happiness Check out more !!! at Bad Mommy Moments, and link up below. We’ll check […]

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Sarah writes

August 16, 2010

on the airplane: leaving and coming home again

She lays her head on the hard metal armrest, feels her back pulled and pushed in ways that are nowhere near comfortable. Her spine is wrapped around the bump between the seats. She cups her hands and rubs her face and tries to wash away this angst she feels. The coming and going in her life. Excitedly leaving the children and their messes behind. Anxiously anticipating her return to it all. To the comfort they bring her. To the comfort of knowing exactly who she is when she is at home, with them, with their messes. She closes her eyes […]

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Sarah writes

August 9, 2010

enough

what i want to write is this: I AM ENOUGH but this is how i feel: i’m afraid i’ll never write another decent stream of words in my life i’m afraid i’ll never be able to hang on to the feeling of calm that a kickass conversation with a close friend brings i’m afraid i’ll get lost in the dirty, boring details–the laundry, the bills, the organizing, scheduling, remembering of life i’m afraid i’ll lose track of where i am and where i wanted to be and all that will remain is a washed-up woman with three children and a […]

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Sarah writes

August 5, 2010

10 things I really can’t come to terms with

10. My body image 9. My children fighting 8. The 3-foot radius of pee around the toilet 7. Grocery shopping–how I loathe thee 6. The fact that our dog is in HEAT–ew! 5. Having zero time to wake.up.alone and adjust to the day and sip my coffee and take a deep breath UNLESS I get up before the kids at 5 am. But then how would I get in the me-time the night before, when I stay up too late cause I don’t want to go to bed cause I don’t want the day to start all over again with […]

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Sarah writes

July 29, 2010

!!!

I cleaned all the doodads off of the bookcase in the living room. The new order gives me room to appreciate not only the books lining the shelves, but the pictures that tell the stories of my life. Especially the one of me at age 5 carving a pumpkin. !!! I swirled through the house like a tornado cleaning up doodads in every room. As I was on my hands in knees in the little boys’ room collecting styrofoam letters and numbers, I reached up to wipe my very sweaty brow and there stood Dan, margarita in hand. Hello, lovely. […]

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Sarah writes

July 28, 2010

making order, making peace

i made the bed this morning. i smoothed the sheets. i laid the blanket down. i folded the throw. i placed the pillows. the order was dreamy. my mind felt clear. i forgot about time pressing upon me. to get dressed. to dress the kids. to get shoes and jackets on. bags of friends and blankies in the car. do the drop off. get to work. i wish these moments lasted longer. Tweet

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Sarah writes

July 26, 2010

move a little closer, would you?

Yesterday we spent the day together. It was bliss. You, me, and 6 kids under 8. 2 pools and 2 noodles and 2 life vests. 2 mommies holding everyone up in the water, watching our kids paddle away, make big waves, jump freely and fearlessly off of the edge. It allowed us to also jump freely off of the edge, that place that makes you pull your hair out, raise your voice more than you’d like, cry a little in the bathroom, stare blankly out the kitchen window while you wash another dish. We knew that our day was filled […]

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Read More in Sarah Writes, sisters, three kids

Last Friday I packed my bags and got on a teeny, tiny little plane headed for DC. I listened to music, wrote in my journal and sipped an ice cold Coke. Before I knew it, I was there, and awaiting the moment I’d finally get to meet my !!! partner in crime. Although she first whizzed right by me at the airport arrivals terminal, CK made another loop and eventually cruised on up to the curb. I gave her a huge hug, jumped in the passenger seat, and started chatting with her girls for the remainder of the car ride. […]

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Sarah writes

July 12, 2010

The sweetness of coming home

Don’t forget to hug them while I’m gone, I said two days earlier. I pulled in the driveway and hustled my things together in the front seat. The shoes I’d kicked off in favor of driving barefoot. The earbuds that provided me two insatiable hours of audiobook fun. My phone, a half-drunk bottle of Coca-Cola, my purse, my wallet, an empty bag of Sun Chips. I grabbed my suitcase from the backseat and glided to the front door. I was already in quiet mode from the drive home and knocked very gently three or four times when I discovered the […]

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Sarah writes

July 8, 2010

i said intentional, dammit

Hello, it’s summer. !!! anyone? Let’s start today out with a BANG, shall we?! Whammo: Need I say more? !!! Ice cream makes me thirsty. I’m not it’s biggest fan. So you know it’s intentional happiness when I take the kids out for Ben and Jerry’s at 7:00 on a Friday night. Let’s forget about the fact that I called Jen and was inspired by her own happy ice cream trip with the kids, that my husband was working late again and just about anything sounded better than wrangling the kids to bed by myself, and that it was Fourth […]

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Sarah writes

July 5, 2010

green sweatshirt

I folded laundry last night and picked up the green, hooded sweatshirt the one that zips up the front, isn’t too cushy, and has highlighted both the blue and brown eyes of my two youngest boys I think it’s days are numbered this favorite piece of clothing and yet I am not ready to pack it away in the attic graveyard Then I remembered all the times yesterday I said something like this “It’ll be easier when they are all older. When they are all 5 and up.” I’m pushing and pulling at time all at once thinking of time […]

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Sarah writes

July 1, 2010

!!! is all around us

INTENTIONAL HAPPINESS Unearthing a box of meticulously folded notes from Junior High? !!! Reading them? Equal parts !!! and ??? to be sure. Will keep you posted; I’ve yet to dive in. Finding a copy of Entertainment Magazine tucked under the treadmill to my left as I cooled down after a quick five miles. More confirmation that I have to read the book that’s been an integral part of the !!! this week for a certain someone I know and love. Looking at this photograph when I need a little pickmeup. Oh, and that’s my MAMA, wearing a motorcycle helmet, […]

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Sarah writes

June 24, 2010

Summertime !!!

We joined a pool !!! It’s 10 minutes away !!! And all of this came with it…get ready (don’t you just love people’s inane lists?)… 8 tennis courts, 2 ping-pong tables, tetherball, shuffleboard (!), four square, basketball, volleyball, a ginormous waterslide, a baby pool, a playground built on SAND with buckets and shovels and watering cans ALREADY THERE to play with so you don’t have to REMEMBER not to FORGET your own… PLUS? A super-awesome concession-y food area that serves food that I actually don’t mind eating. Hummus and pita platter with fresh veggies? Yes, thank you. Spinach salad with […]

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Read More in Sarah Writes

Happiness comes and goes. I find myself drifting between its drops. One moment feeling the warmth and comfort of its embrace, the next believing I’ll be stuck in a shady place for the rest of my days. In the midst of an anger running so deep I nearly could not contain it, I decided to take an impromptu trip to the beach on Saturday night. We didn’t get there until about 7:00 pm. And showed up without swimsuits or towels or buckets with shovels. We just showed up. We kicked off our shoes. And my boys ran, laughed and played. […]

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Sarah writes

June 16, 2010

Life is a Carousel

I have to stop trying to figure out how to slow it down or make it stop And simply cherish the ride even if I get dizzy more than I’d like Tweet

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Sarah writes

June 10, 2010

!!!

(Things that made me happy this week) Remember the dog that eats the food off my floor so I don’t really have to clean? Yup. Still happy about that. • 2YO insisting he drink his yogurt through the straw of his cereal bowl. 7YO grabbing a marker and a scrap of paper to draw a !!! because I was laughing so hard. Laughing = me happy = my kid happy = !!! Simple as that. • Oh, I hope you can see the detail on this one. You might want to click on the picture for an enlargement. 7YO says […]

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Sarah writes

June 8, 2010

Mid-Disaster

Max throws a cup at me and screams “I want juice!” Ethan climbs onto the kitchen counter and stands on his tippy toes, rummaging through the snack bin. Jamis says, “Mom, Mom, did you hear me?” for the third time. And then, “I asked you three times.” Excuse me, I think to myself, doesn’t that make for six requests? For the same thing? The phone rings. I answer it. It’s my husband on the line. He needs something, too. I pull Ethan off the counter and walk out of the kitchen, down the hall, trying to find some quiet to […]

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Sarah writes

June 4, 2010

!!!

Last night I wanted to give up. Crawl under the covers and let my mind fall away. The boys pushed every last nerve. Literally. I wrote this on the whiteboard in our office: Apparently I made sure to date it so that I could remember the exact moment I was about to lose it. (Good thing it’s erasable and I didn’t carve it into the bedroom doors, my forehead or worse, my kids’ backsides? I’m sure I’d regret that.) I’m amazed I didn’t put a time-stamp on it, too. If I had to guess, it was probably between 6:00 and […]

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Sarah writes

June 2, 2010

Five for Ten: Outstanding Contributions

I know, I know, Five for Ten is officially over, done, vamoose! However, Jen and I really wanted to acknowledge a post from each category that deeply moved us. Maybe tomorrow I’ll get my writing wheels back, but for now, go check out these fine writers and the posts that knocked our socks off. Courage: Whereever Launa Goes–Bon Courage Happiness: Being Rudri–The Pendulum Memory: Two Job Mama–Only the Good Parts. Mostly. Lust: The Miller Mix–Three Lovers Yes: Eva Evolving–Inching Toward Yes Tweet

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Sarah writes

May 28, 2010

!!!

(Things that made me happy this week) • Giving in to popsicle demands to quiet the beasts at 5:57 am • Unearthing $10 and a Starbucks card from a pile of doodads teetering on my bookshelf I’m pretty sure the beverage I purchase with that gift card will warrant another !!! moment • Perfect Curls • An hour of peace, quiet and foot beautification. Taking the extra time to shave my legs for the occasion was a double bonus. • Handing Ethan a bowl of yogurt and watching him walk to the back stoop and enjoy it all alone. Because […]

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Guest Author writes

May 20, 2010

The Top Ten Reasons I’m Done (so stop asking)

When CK said Hey, you guys want a day to catch up on Five for Ten stuff? I said, Hell, Yeah. And not only because I need a day off, but because Bad Mommy Moments is badass. Equal parts snark and sentiment, CK spins a tale like nobody’s business. Today she’s here to make you laugh. And me laugh…because I’m not sure if I am done. But after I read this, I concluded I was downright crazy for not getting on board with the Top Ten. Without further ado… The Top Ten Reasons I’m Done (so stop asking) I don’t […]

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Sarah writes

May 19, 2010

YES to YOU

YES to new friends. Connections and Voices YES to letting go and reaching out and diving in YES to pushing and stretching and finding your words and sharing them here with us I am in awe. I am absolutely amazed. I am dancing in my tragically unhip shoes over here, starting to get back a little bit of that spanky and delicious, and all because of you. YES, you. Out there. The ones who have come here to read and write for 10 days. How did you do it? Aren’t you tired? A little tired of Momalom? A little tired […]

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Sarah writes

May 17, 2010

Lust for Lust

I have it. Oh, how I have it. Lust for lust. The want…to want. I’m not talking about lust for a quiet home, an easy dinner, a book, a bath, a pedicure. I’m talking about pure, hot, pounding lust. The fire that starts in your chest, quickens your breath, and moves to your thighs–making every limb tingle, bringing every cell to life. I want that. I want it back. If I squint really hard I can see through the haze of these cluttered, chaotic days. An image of this girl in a bikini pops up. I know she’s not a […]

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Sarah writes

May 15, 2010

Accepting Memory

I am standing in the shower. A mosaic of pea green tile under my feet. The sun of a hot, Florida day streaming in through the glass-blocked window beside me. Water streams down upon a body I have worked hard to win back after birthing my first child. In a matter of minutes I am flooded with memories I would rather forget. Guilt, shame, and loss swell my heart and the bucket tips over. Tears pour from me nearly as fast as the water from the showerhead. I push back at the memories. I want to grab them with both […]

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Sarah writes

May 13, 2010

The !!! of My Life

I have written and rewritten my About page several times. For many months now it has stood mostly blank.  I find it to be an incredibly difficult and daunting task. And this is just a blog. Not the dust jacket on a new novel. Not a bio in a magazine. Not a profile for Match.com. Just a blog. The irony of it all is that I am able to share intensely personal things in my posts, but when it comes to my About page, I clam up. I can’t figure out how to distill myself into one or two cute […]

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Sarah writes

May 10, 2010

The Sidelines

The sun beats down on me as I sit on the sidelines. The vastness of the bright green playing field is filled in with players wearing blue and white jerseys, three stripes down the side of their shorts and across the tops of their socks. The ball pops here and there, in and out of bounds, over heads, into goals, and through the breeze that pushes tears around my face. I pull my hat further down and shift in the taupe spectator chair. I swirl the ice in my coffee and kick off my shoes. I have shut down. My […]

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Sarah writes

May 3, 2010

Moving into Motherhood: Revisited

As we’re gearing up for Five for Ten, we’ve decided to repost some oldies this week. Need a refresher on Five for Ten? Just go hang out in the sidebar over there. You can find the rules and our topics and even link up! We’ll see you back here on the 10th, all fresh and new! ****************** Newly Mothering (originally posted on August 5, 2009) Yup, I’m on Facebook. Who isn’t? It’s kind of like Twitter…and sex…I go through phases. This week I am happy to announce that I’ve reconnected with an old high school friend. We’ve been Facebook “friends” […]

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Sarah writes

May 1, 2010

Five for Ten Again: TOPICS!!!

May 10 & 11 — Courage May 12 & 13 — Happiness May 14 & 15 — Memory May 16 & 17 — Lust May 18 & 19 — Yes The topics are broad. General. You can tweak them however you want. They can be funny, introspective, academic, vulnerable. Whatever you wish. Be creative. Be daring. But most of all, be yourself. Two things of note: The last topic, Yes, is in honor of Aidan Donnelley Rowley’s debut novel, Life After Yes, which hits bookshelves on May 18th. The timing couldn’t be more perfect, right? I’m excited to read it. […]

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Read More in Sarah Writes, three kids

I’m cackling over here. I know, I know, it’s my family, so it’s a whole lot funnier to me (and Jen and Geege, I hope). But really? Let’s take a peek at some details. Like Jen’s vivacious skirt, worn with thick tights and sneakers. And how about GG? Those glasses are funkalicious. She’s one hot tamale. And those sandals? I think she wore that style for about 12 years–going through a few pairs until she finally moved on to…hmm. Mom? What did you move on to after those leather criss-cross thongy things? I’m just little and cute, so we can […]

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Sarah writes

April 28, 2010

Five for Ten Again: Rules and Regulations

We’ve been bombarded with enthusiasm (and a few questions) since we announced the return of Five for Ten last week. So let’s go over the details, shall we? Five for Ten will run from Monday, May 10 to Wednesday, May 19 Jen or I will post each day during the 10 days You, dear reader, are asked to visit Momalom each day and leave a comment We, in return, will visit your blog and leave you a comment OK, is it getting clearer? Pretty simple, right? We give you five minutes (well, more like 10 or 15) if you give […]

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Sarah writes

April 27, 2010

Dishing out the Five for Ten details

Has anyone noticed the recent influx of baby pictures? Man, I’m wistful for the early days. This is my first little guy, Jamis, back when every moment was cute. We lived in Florida. Life was simple. What the heck happened? And…can I ever get a glimpse of that again? Just for a day? *** We’ll be serving up some details on Five for Ten tomorrow! Please be sure to stop by. Grab the button code from our sidebar while you’re here, and plaster it on your site, in a post, or on your forehead. Whatever suits you. We are excited […]

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Sarah writes

April 24, 2010

Happy, Happy, Happy Birthday, GG!

A couple of generations ago a baby girl was born. Her parents named her Gail. She grew and grew and welcomed five brothers and sisters to her tribe. Eventually, her siblings dubbed her “sister-mother” and joked that her daughterly perfection was the reason for their very existence. Gail went off to college to study art. She sunbathed on rooftops and drank beer with her classmates. She met a red-haired boy in a college bar and fell in love. They wrote letters to one another and addressed them to various rooms in their apartment: “Dear Gail, in the kitchen, from John, […]

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Sarah writes

April 21, 2010

It’s going by too fast

Somebody slow it down. Please. It’s going by much too fast. My life. And theirs. Can we just slow it down? Stop it, even. *** To think, I couldn’t wait for this little boy to grow up. But now I’m done with growing. I want it to end. Because this boy face is too old now. This boy body too big. And his rhythm is now independent of me. His rhythm is all his own. It, and time, march on. While I wince at just trying to keep up. *** It’s going by too fast. It’s what everyone says. We […]

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Sarah writes

April 19, 2010

Five for Ten Again!

Yay! Five for Ten is coming back, baby! And this time, with a spin and a twist and a turn and…you get the point, right? So, are you new to Five for Ten? Well, back in November, 2009, Jen and I had this wild idea to commit to ten days of getting to know our readers a bit better. You can educate yourselves on the logistics of the whole affair here. And you can browse all the Five for Ten posts here. What you are really going to be most interested in–if you choose to browse the posts–is the comments […]

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Read More in Sarah Writes

Just a thought (and then I’m sure Jen will post something a little more put-together later on): I sometimes wish there weren’t such an emphasis on being present. I feel an enormous amount of pressure to enjoy the moments with my kids. And so often I feel like it’s just impossible. Not because of me, but because of the management of life. It is gorgeous outside right now. The sun is shining its late-afternoon glow. The boys are alternating between snacking and drinking and bouncing on the trampoline. They wander in and out of the house looking for me, needing […]

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Read More in motherhood, Sarah Writes

The little lips that blew out my candles The little hands that dug into my cake Happy faces Yummy tummies And I know for certain that all I need is their love Their sweet and pudgy love wrapped around me always My birthday was a celebration for my kids and that’s exactly the way it should be now *************** Are you on Facebook? Show Momalom some love and become a fan! Tweet

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Sarah writes

April 9, 2010

What’s In My Bag

Miss Liz from But Then I Had Kids tagged me and Jen for the fun little meme that’s been going around. I was a bit ashamed to put up a picture of the old bag I had slung over my shoulder. It was a sad, sad thing. But Spring has sprung and my birthday is days away, so I treated myself to a cute new bag with matching wristlet. Goodbye brown suede bag! Our days are officially over. I will not pull you out of the closet for a “change of scenery.” You are no longer welcome in my world […]

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Sarah writes

April 8, 2010

Today, you can

Yesterday was hard. Hard hard hard. The kind of hard that is actually pretty simple, but you feel tested every second of the day anyway. Like someone is asking you if you can handle it. The mundane. Another nap time. Another meal time. Another cross-your-fingers-that-the-tv-works time. Ethan woke up at 1 am on Tuesday night — or is it Wednesday morning? — and never went back to sleep. So every little bitty thing about the day was hard just hard the exhaustion was real my heart was lost left in the bed where my sleep was robbed of me I […]

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Jen writes

April 7, 2010

Top Tips: A Sampling

There are things we all wished we’d known before we had kids. Things we wish other mothers had told us about. Things beyond “Sleep when the baby sleeps.” Things like, sometimes squeezing in a shower is an accomplishment more satisfying than your greatest professional achievement. So, we’ve decided to offer up some tips of our own. A brief glimpse at the many things we’ve learned since becoming moms–in most cases since becoming moms of three. Here’s what we have for you this time, in no particular order at all: 1. Say Yes to your kids as often as you can. […]

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Sarah writes

April 5, 2010

A Heroic Quest

Required Reading >> There are few things you must know Yesterday I was feeling lost. Oh so very, very lost. I could not figure out what to do with myself. And so, with coffee cup in hand, I started perusing my bookshelves for words of meaning and purpose. A favorite of mine sat perched near the edge on its side, left there for easy access. I ruffled through and read several passages of The Parent’s Tao Te Ching, but came back time and time again to one, in particular. So I decided to share it here on the blog. Today […]

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Sarah writes

April 4, 2010

There are few things you must know

There are few things you must know to become a wise parent. You must know that you are going to die, for then you will be able to truly live. You must know when you have enough, for then you will be content. You must know how to laugh, for then you will find healing. There are many things you need not know. You need not know everything your children think or do. You need not know their secret dreams and hopes. You need not know how life will unfold for them, or for yourself. ** Live your own life, […]

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I’m not a bumper sticker kind of girl. And it’s actually kind of troubling. I know. Bumper Stickers. Silly, really. Stop looking into things so deeply, you say? Yeah, bad habit. It’s okay, I’m used to it. And besides, it doesn’t always turn out so bad. Yesterday I drove Jamis down a suburban, tree-lined street on the way home from school. Runners on either side of us, bicycles whizzing by. A grey Honda Odyssey was ahead of us with 26.2 wrapped in an oval and stuck to the rear. It was the only sticker on the body of the vehicle. […]

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Sarah writes

March 29, 2010

the rainbows of my life

play me a rainbow bridges over my life i see myself beneath it i stand tall in the middle looking up and back and forth side to side the smile of my first-born son at one end the beginning of it all this life my existence my motherhood my heart pulled and pushed and twisted torn tattered tattooed i heave and sigh. so many thoughts and emotions. so much to do. even more to feel. i breathe quick and slow. heavy and hard. sometimes i forget i am breathing at all. and think my children are doing it for me. […]

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Sarah writes

March 27, 2010

Mommy has a tattoo

I have a tattoo. Here’s a little visual for you. A photograph taken on my wedding day. In my white dress. In front of a lighthouse altar. My arm gently folded around my man’s broad hand. It was a sunny Cape Cod day full of promise, and new beginnings. Despite life’s fresh starts, we all are branded by the past. I am branded. This tattoo is the most obvious of examples. I cannot hide it. I cannot remove it. It drops beneath shirt sleeves, and peeks through pale, woven sweaters. It is boldly displayed in a tank top or (gasp!) […]

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Jen and Sarah writes

March 23, 2010

The Mommy Contest

We could also have titled this “Why We Think Moms Should Give Up a Little Control” but, that just doesn’t sound as catchy, does it? So, The Mommy Contest We don’t want to win the mommy contest You know the one The one where you have to be the smartest the calmest the one with the superhero costume in her purse the healthy snacks and the right answers to everything We spend so much time thinking and talking about what it is to be a mother Because the judgments come from every direction There are no clear answers anywhere And […]

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Sarah writes

March 22, 2010

The evolution of parenting three kids

A very wise reader named Cathy recently emailed me during my dealings with a certain little liar we know. Cathy is a mom to three boys, like me, and had this to say about having three kids: Parenting my first is an experiment; I practice with my second; the third just seems natural. This sentence caught in my throat as I read it. It cleared the skies and lifted me up. It absolutely defines life with my three boys. Jamis gets the brunt of me. The crispy edges of my parenthood. The raw material, not yet performed. Everything with Max […]

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Sarah writes

March 16, 2010

Liar Update: The Harvest

If you are new to the Liar Mini-Series you can catch up here: Part I – Need Some Advice Part II – Planting The Seed Part III – Cultivation Okay, so I was going to title this “Liar Conclusion,” but for some leeeetle reason, I don’t seem to think this will be the last time I’m dealing in lies and punishment. And let’s totally put aside the fact that there will be two other boys someday learning Mommy’s Big Lesson. By all accounts, many of you had it right when you proclaimed Jamis one smooth criminal. He’s smart and sweet […]

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Sarah writes

March 13, 2010

Liar Update: Cultivation

I know, I know, this Liar Series is turning into quite a to-do. But here’s the truth: I need to write about this. I need to write about it here on the blog. I need your comments, insight and perspective. I am not shy one bit when it comes to telling you that my life is chaotic, I don’t know what the hell I am doing, and I love to hear suggestions and advice from others because, did you hear me, I DON’T KNOW WHAT I’M DOING AND I’M NOT GOING TO PRETEND THAT I DO. So, today’s update. I’m […]

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Sarah writes

March 12, 2010

Liar Update: Planting a Seed

I love the comments here. I love the community. I love that I can ask for advice and you all deliver. If you have no idea what I am talking about, you can catch up by reading yesterday’s post about my 7-year-old liar. I picked up the kids yesterday afternoon and proceeded with the day as usual. I wanted the conversation with my little liar to be one-on-one and uninterrupted, which meant postponing it until the little boys were in bed. However, I still intended to arm myself with some facts. While Jamis was doing homework in the living room, […]

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Sarah writes

March 11, 2010

Need some advice

Okay, friends. Today’s post is not about pretty writing and aha! moments. I need some advice. Here are the details: On Monday afternoon I took the boys to the grocery store. There was a sale on Crayola products in the aisle of the frozen foods section. Go figure. In an effort to quiet the beasts, I tossed three items in the cart: some crayons, markers and colored pencils. Upon leaving the store my 7-year-old, Jamis, made a weak and false attempt at helping me load the groceries into the car. It was all so that he could just find and […]

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Sarah writes

March 9, 2010

Make You Smile

Yesterday was a rough day. Today I want to wake up with a smile. There are a few more people I know who also deserve another reason to lift the corners of their lips. Happy Birthday to Becca! I wish you nothing but sugary sweetness on your special day, girl. To Wolfie! For your wit, charm and whimsy. I’ve got thimbles on for you today, BLW. And to Kitch. (sigh) You’re in my soul, sister. Play Me and Be Happy Because sometimes it really is that simple. (note: if you click anywhere, that fancy, happy song will get cut off. […]

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March 6, 2010

Spring Again

I am ready for Spring. I am ready for fresh and new and change and glee. Grass that greens under the soft, bare feet of my three boys. Sprinklers to chill us on the warm days and mist us on the hot ones. I am ready for bouncing through the air as if swept up with the breeze. I am ready to be unleashed. Unlocked. There are glimpses of it here and there in our mixed up, messy New England weather. And there are glimpses of the freedom that warmth and sunshine bring: walks to the playground that don’t require […]

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March 3, 2010

MomalomDesigns

I’m sorry for the recent distance between us. And the fact that I haven’t even had the decency to return an email or swing by your blogs and leave a comment on the brilliant posts that you have labored over. The thing is, I’ve been entertaining another one of my passions: Design. Instead of taking the time to do a revamp of Momalom, I’ve kicked it up a notch and been spending time with another blog. That’s right, CK is the proud owner of a newly designed blog courtesy of patience, hard work and too many late nights (for the […]

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February 28, 2010

No, I’m not pregnant

I ran 7 miles on Saturday. (Collective cheer!) And then I came home and disrobed and stood in front of the mirror. (Collective sigh.) I stared head-on at my figure as the steam billowed from the shower. What a downer. I pulled and pushed at my body. I bent down and took notice of how things hang. I glared. It’s not pretty. And neither am I. Or at least, I feel far from it. I stepped on the scale. (Secondary sigh.) I’m pretty sure the current number represents one too many days of treating myself, or easing myself. It’s also […]

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February 25, 2010

This is my life: My boys, My heart

Little boys are little boys are little boys are…cute. Want-to-eat-you-up cute. Want-to-bury-you-in-the-couch-cushions cute. Want-to-make-a-fort-and-hide-in-it-with-you-forever cute. My boys are rough and tumble. My boys are sweet. My boys are unafraid and loud, quirky and energetic. They are all mine, and I am nothing but lucky. And when I think I’m missing out on something by being a mama of all boys, only boys, boys-all-the-time boys, not-a-pink-dress-in-sight boys, I can look at these photos and sweetly smile and say, “Yeah, this is my life. And it’s a great, great life.” Look at my little George Washington in the bottom right-hand corner. Oh […]

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February 24, 2010

Momento

My mama’s got an iPhone and loves to browse the App Store, otherwise known as the nifty little place where all things you can imagine are made possible for the iPhone. Games, Stock Tips, Calorie Counters, my handy dandy Google Reader. We send each other little tips on Apps we think are fun or cool or handy. The last App she recommended to me is called Momento. It’s like a daily journal where you can record little thoughts and pictures and choose to share them with others, if you like. I haven’t shared my scrambled words with anyone yet–nope, not […]

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February 19, 2010

Consequences and Punishments

What are you doing? Nothing, he says. What’s in your mouth? Nothing, he says. Open it. (He opens it. Can’t see anything. Candy must be hidden inside his cheek.) Were you in the bathroom? No, he says. Were you in the pantry getting candy without asking? No, he says. Then what were you doing? I was walking around and reading, he says. (I have mandated an hour of peace in my house. The little boys are napping. It’s been a busy on-the-go morning and I’m reclining on the couch, laptop perched, dog’s head rested on my legs. I don’t want […]

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February 17, 2010

This is my life: Food Before Blog

Although I am tinkering with about 12 different posts right now–both on-screen and in-mind–I thought I’d send out a little something to whet your whistle. Reason No. 29 why I haven’t written a new blog post in nearly a week: I went away for the weekend and left my kids in the hands of  Fabulous-Babysitter-Kelsey and Rockin’-Mama-Geege. You want to know what else I left in their hands? Bio-hazardous waste masquerading as edibles in my refrigerator. In between thinking about, procrastinating, and actually DOING the packing for my weekend getaway, cleaning out the fridge was overlooked. Upon returning from the […]

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(i wish i had more for you but my brain can’t handle any more than this and i’m okay with that because as jen says “motherhood is hard, yo” and these words just have to be good enough for now) my brain is swirling whirling disappearing and coming back around to itself there are lists and tasks and chores and goals i have to do and meet and be the exhaustion is pushed away by caffeine and kid-chasing, but it’s still there and i get weary of worrying if i’m keeping perspective on life, my life, this life somewhere underneath […]

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February 6, 2010

There comes a time when the yelling has to stop

I rocked my 7-year-old boy in my arms, his long body hanging off mine, flowing onto the white down comforter and the well-worn green flannel sheets that wrapped the mattress of my own childhood bed. How can he be so big? It’s not fair that I can’t curl him into me anymore. I sat and held him while he sobbed. I felt the release of his cares and his worry–his constant awareness of the expectations he can never seem to meet. Our expectations. “The little boys take a lot of work, don’t they?” I asked. “Yeah,” he muttered. “It’s crazy […]

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January 28, 2010

This is my life: Just don’t call me Lois

This video has me on-the-floor-rolling-laughing-oh-my-god-the-funny every single time. Tweet

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January 27, 2010

This is my life: Three Wild Boys

This video really says it all but I can’t resist adding a few words–after all, I’m a word girl. On more than one occasion I’ve had people come to our house and stand in the hallway afraid to step foot in the living room. They witness boys literally bouncing off walls, off each other, the floor, the couch, the puppy. I know what they are thinking: that I have absolutely no control over my kids and I let them run rampant and how on Earth can I allow this behavior to continue. No wonder I look so tired, no wonder […]

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January 24, 2010

Bad Habits

Just a few months ago I was running 21 miles in 24 hours, waking at 5 am for a 60 minute swim, eating right, feeling fast and relishing an increased sex drive due to my aerobic endeavors and a wealth of endorphins. And now, mid-January finds me with cocktail in hand nearly every night, trying to milk the hours after the kids have gone to sleep. I’m awake too long; I sleep too late; I move only as much as needed; which, although is quite a lot when you have three boys running here and there, is nothing compared to […]

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January 23, 2010

Make The Ordinary Come Alive

Do not ask your children to strive for extraordinary lives. Such striving may seem admirable, but it is a way of foolishness. Help them instead to find the wonder and the marvel of an ordinary life. Show them the joy of tasting tomatoes, apples and pears. Show them how to cry when pets and people die. Show them the infinite pleasure in the touch of a hand. And make the ordinary come alive for them. The extraordinary will take care of itself. From The Parent’s Tao Te Ching by William Martin Tweet

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January 22, 2010

Neighborly Love

The fantastic Miss Amy over at The Never-True Tales has started a Fabulous Friday Guest Post chain called Won’t You Be My Neighbor? I’m sure you’ve heard about this, as it seems to be popping up everywhere in the Neighborhood. We are delighted by our blog community and thus delighted to have become a part of the Guest Post Mania! Head over to The Never-True Tales for Driving Under the Cellular Influence. And check out the link below for more information on how to get your own neighbors to join in the fun! Tweet

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January 18, 2010

Perspective

Max is two. Officially. But almost-nearly-not-quite three. He has a bump on his tummy next to his navel. It comes and goes, protruding a barely noticeable amount one day and becoming an alarming size the next. We don’t know what it is. The doctor doesn’t know what it is. And in common terms, it’s freaking me out! _______________________ My car broke down last week. I was driving along and then I wasn’t. And then I was stuck at home, or was I? The kids went off to school and dayhome and I was left to a house full of laundry […]

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January 14, 2010

We care what people think about us

I went for a swim last night. I wanted release. I wanted weightlessness. The constant, rhythmic exertion. The void of outside distraction. The forced internal focus. The freedom of knowing I have nowhere to hide. That it is just me and the water. And that time, though tracked by lengths and breaths, is suspended. I can slip between the minutes and vanish from the public eye. I got in the pool and I did a few laps and I waited for the smooth motions to take over my body and for my mind to find it’s essential resting spot for […]

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January 12, 2010

(un)stuck

Yesterday I was cruising along in my car singing the Pussycat Dolls. It was the middle of the work day and I was being a good girl and doing the bank run. I hate to do the bank run. What’s fun about depositing tens and hundreds of thousands of dollars into accounts that are not yours? Nothing. Nothing at all. It’s rather depressing, actually. But I was rather content with the day. Just for being. Thank you, day, for being what you are sometimes. Another chance. Upon leaving the bank I noticed a puddle in the parking lot. My van […]

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I want so much to sit here and write. Breathe poetry and magic and spin words that lay dormant in my heart. But the days are so long. And I am so drained. And my body longs for sleep. My mind beckons peace. So today a short quip. I packed the family for a trip to the pool this afternoon. Come hell or high water I was determined to get the kids out of this house. The pool is always a fabulous destination and so I packed. We left. We drove. We arrived. There was ten minutes of struggling two […]

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January 5, 2010

Should I let my kid win sometimes?

When I was a kid my brother, my sister and I would hole up in a bedroom or the corner of the living room during the Holiday break and start a marathon tournament of Monopoly. At least, I assume it was winter. I think I remember flannel pajamas, well-worn slippers and blankets tucked around our legs. I know I remember mornings before my parents had risen spent trading Park Place for all of those Orange properties. St. James Place? New York Avenue? I remember the sound of the tossing dice–cheers and grumbles both at the resulting numbers. I remember losing […]

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December 29, 2009

The Life I Lead

I imagine a different life from time to time. I imagine a bank account with many zeroes. A larger house. Curtains that match. Walls that are painted with one swish of an arm. I imagine nooks and crannies elegantly decorated for comfort, inviting me to read a book with my children. Floor pillows I’ve had the time to sew. Meals homemade and nourishing–like my sister knows how to do. But it is a different life I lead right now. Rushed and harried. But not forever. And I am not alone. Some days are calm and flow with me. I can […]

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December 28, 2009

Five for Fighting

There is so much fighting in this house that it makes me want to scream. No. It does make me scream. And then I’m only adding to the mess. Heightening it, actually. How are the children to learn self-discipline and composure when I’m flying off the handle? How are they to learn patience with sharing and learning when my husband has so little patience with them? It’s the same conundrum so many mothers face: I’m yelling at my kids to stop yelling. Oh the irony. The painful, not so simple, irony. And it just doesn’t seem to quit. No matter […]

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December 27, 2009

A Christmas Wish Come True

I keep thinking about magic. It’s the time of year no doubt. The tales I tell of Santa and his sleigh. The songs we sing. The reindeer food that we’ll throw up to the roof on Christmas eve. The enchantment of gifts that will spill out from under the tree, delighting us all with their pretty papers and silky bows. It is magical. The spirit of giving. The charm of a season. The memories and traditions we are creating in this cozy house of ours. Despite all the stresses of money and time–how much to spend, what to give, when […]

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December 17, 2009

Sleeping Beneath the Tree

Jen is right. It is the experiences of childhood that tell the tale of our youth as we get older and gain perspective about our upbringing. It is not only the opportunities that we are offered–soccer camps, slumber parties and piano lessons–or the material gifts that shower down upon us on Christmas and birthdays, but the experiences we share directly with our parents. The small stuff as much as the big. The time that is devoted to us individually. A one-on-one experience. An experience that is engineered to delight both child and parent. A moment to be shared, to be […]

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December 13, 2009

The Half-Drunk Winner Is?

Jen and I have read every entry. We have talked, emailed and Instant Messaged all week. We are awestruck. We are honored. Every one of our participants gave this community something brave and daring. Something that we, ourselves, found difficult to do. Time and time again we both came back to Kitch. Her words pummeled me with honesty and depth and heartache. With introspection and reflection alike. I am proud to name The Kitchen Witch as the winner of our Half-Drunk Challenge. But dare I say we all are winners? Dare I? Has it not been an amazing week? More […]

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December 13, 2009

Cast Your Ballot

Thank you. Just Really. Thank you. Jen and I are blown away by the response to the Half-Drunk Challenge. It was just another idea, you see. An idea that I threw out there. An idea that became, like Five for Ten, a self-sustaining means to new connections, and stronger connections–to a group of insightful people that choose, like us, to spend a great amount of time in the written world. My two littlest boys are snug in their beds for a midday nap. The oldest child plays games with his father. I finally have some time to cozy up in […]

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December 11, 2009

Breakable

There are certain things my husband just will not do. It amazes me that he has the resolve to walk away so easily. To leave something undone. Without guilt. Without a second thought. To leave it in my hands. My hands that are already exhausted by all that needs doing in life. The chores, the tasks, the mountains of laundry. The wiping of noses, the tying of laces, the dressing, feeding, caretaking of my mommy life. I am exhausted by the mere thought of it all, let alone the execution. Exhausted by trying to ignore my duties, by trying to […]

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December 8, 2009

Drunk Love – Song and Celebration

Excuse the typos. And the grammatical errors. And the nonsensicalness. But I? Am drunk. Most definitely so. Just wanted to impart two things tonite. In a silly way. And in a somewhat daring way. To keep the vibe of the challenge going. 1. Tonight, while being subjected to the Carrie Underwood special on television, my husband and I admitted to one another that we actually like the following song. Let me be clear: we are not country. However, after divulging that I freely sing along when I hear it, Dan chimed in that he’ll give way to robust sing-a-long also […]

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December 7, 2009

Half-Drunk Challenge Entries

Join us. Drink. Be Merry. Write. Go here AND here for some info. Then LINK UP and join in the fun. Tweet

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December 5, 2009

Half-Drunk Challenge

Play Me The morning I woke up hungover and remembered I had actually published a post entitled Drunken Rambling about my Optimistic Clitoris I decided to challenge as many readers as I could to write something daring. This particular post of mine was clearly the result of Nablopomo pressure, four Gin and Tonics, and a lack of any other ideas at the time. But I wondered what could happen if we actually PLANNED to get loose and write! So here we go. Start your engines. Get out the cabernet. This is a challenge to write something a little bit daring. […]

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I have two separate text documents on my computer filled with attempts at explaining my reaction to Jen’s post from yesterday. It’s important for me to respond to her even though I’ve been having some trouble finding all the words. She has spun a stimulating thread here. I have read and reread the insightful comments from our dedicated readers, and it is obvious that her words have inspired a wealth of thoughts and emotions about our roles as parents. How we foster independence in our children. How much or little we intervene with their choices. How accepting we are of […]

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November 30, 2009

And the winners are…

Thanksgiving was perfecto! However, it did kinda sorta skew my focus for a few days. It’s taken me longer than I expected to get to this post. It seems I was more concerned about eating pie and keeping toddlers out of trouble than I was about the blog. Phew! That was hard to admit. Especially after Five for Ten. Especially after the influx of comments and blogs we so happily devoured. I will shamelessly say that I spent much more time with my computer than I did with my kids for those ten days. That this blog space was more […]

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November 28, 2009

The banter of family

We talk about sleep. Wine-induced sleep. What a blessing. What a curse. We talk about age. Sixty and six months and everything in between. What it means to grow old. What it takes to stay young. We talk about the kids. How active they are. How much energy they have. How much energy they take. From us. All day. We banter. About the little things. Happily. Because we are family. And this is what we do. And it is comfortable. To talk about nothing in particular. When you are with family. There is no agenda. No point. No expectation. But […]

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November 26, 2009

Thanksgiving

Yeah. The day will probably end up like this for my husband. On MomalomsMom’s couch. Feet up. Children running circles around him. Tugging at his feet. Crawling on his chest. While he sleeps through it all. In fact, he’s taking a nap as I write this. As my oldest son animates the Military Channel. As my grandmother inquires about our latest good reads. As my best friend calls me to wish a Happy Thanksgiving. The bird cooks. The stuffing is stuffed. The beans are greening up. And I am happy as can be. I might, however, have to borrow some […]

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November 24, 2009

Lasting Impressions

I can’t quite believe it is the final day here at Five for Ten. Excuse me if I run long today, my heart is full. Very full. My heart runneth over with worry and fear and joy and expression and memory on most days, but today it is filled with lasting amounts of honesty and love. Honest love. The draft of the very first Five for Ten post – the introduction to our adventure – sat on my laptop waiting for a little bit of bravery. I finished typing it up and went to the couch for a Friday night […]

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Stress. The devil. Do they indeed mean the same thing? My husband is stressed. Has started a new company and is just so, well, STRESSED. On top of the demands for his time from both clients and family that he cannot fulfill, and the financial deadlines he must meet so as to keep the house in our name AND the heat turned on, he’s got the fucking flu. Whoops, I cursed. Hoping I don’t offend any of too many of you. Because he is stressed, I am stressed, and the kids get stressed because our patience is fickle – waffling […]

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November 18, 2009

The Threads of Sisterhood

Pigtails. Aren’t I cute? This is me, age 5, Kindergarten. I adored that sweater in every way that a little girl can adore an article of clothing. The buttons were white hearts hand-painted with some pinky, girly, swirly somethings. And I was as cute as those buttons for a day or two—until my mom was fed up with finding two eyelet ribbons in my back pack at the end of every day instead wrapped around my rubberbands. She threatened to cut off my hair if I didn’t stop pulling out my pigtails. Or my braids. Or my Mindys. Remember Mindys? […]

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November 16, 2009

When you aren’t sure what to write, just ask

Reminders. If you are just joining us here and wondering what that big, bold Five for Ten sign is up there, well, be daring and click on it! It is not too late to jump in. Hell, I’m late for everything. We’ll love you just the same if you commit today and join in the connections. If you have the time to click over to any of the other readers leaving us the most fabulous comments, please do. It is not a requirement of the game, but how about making another blogger’s day just a little bit happier? Oh, I […]

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November 14, 2009

Come on. You know you want to!

Listen Here. We all spend a heck of a lot of time thinking about our lives, breaking things down into posts, and piecing the words together. We deserve a little more from it all, and Jen and I really want to make that happen. So we have decided to start Five for Ten. If you are just landing here, please take a moment to read yesterday’s post and then come on back. Rules of the Game. Eek. I have a great aversion to the word “rules” – except when it comes to my kids, of course – but I suppose […]

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November 13, 2009

Five for Ten

How do you ask people to stop and take a look at your blog for five minutes a day, ten days in a row, so that you can have a chance at proving yourself? Wait, no. It’s not proof you need. It’s connection. To give and to get. To form. It’s helping people understand that you want is to create a space that is so full of connections that they feel compelled to touch base. It is building this place where we speak to each other. Where the writer reaches out and the reader reaches back. Where the conversations flourish […]

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November 3, 2009

When life gets in the way of motherhood

My boy is sick. He lays beside me in bed right now telling me over and over it’s time for him to go to sleep. Finally admitting that he feels horrible. He isn’t just “fine.” Telling me that he loves me and that he wants me to be right next to him. Right now and all night long. In my big comfortable cloud of a bed. So here we are. Dan will sleep on the couch. I will sleep next to my boy. His fever will drift up and down. I will be here to medicate him and mother him. […]

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November 1, 2009

Many the Miles

Play Me I pulled on my running tights yesterday and laced up my new sneakers. I snaked through the streets in my neighborhood, up the hill past a golf course, along tree-lined avenues painted with picturesque houses, through a lonely college campus. It was Halloween and the weather couldn’t have been more elegantly creepy and magical. There was a forceful wind. It pushed me and I pushed right back. Leaves danced across the streets, bathed the sidewalks, and breezed with me as I broke free. From that world indoors. The one that I love so dearly; the one that pushes […]

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October 27, 2009

Connections

People change me. I am so ready to be changed. It is not a failure or a flaw. It is not a sign that I waffle easily, that I am unsure of who I am and what I want. Instead, I know it to be the natural course of my life. There is always another way to do things. How do I know I’m doing it right? How do I know that I look best in blue? Why would I think that my answers are correct? I look for help. I look for reassurance. I look for change. And most […]

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October 26, 2009

Gratitude

Hi. My mind is stuck. There is a post at half-mast just waiting to be released. I have to catch some wind and will then set it free. But I wanted just to say, in the meantime, that my heart is full. Thank you for the comments. It is love. And I am grateful. I linked up to Jill’s contest pretty late in the game. Barely made the cut-off. Just wanted to be part of this wonderful community. Out of many wonderful entries, she picked one. She picked mine. I was more than just a little shocked to find this […]

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October 22, 2009

A very wealthy life

This is the place where we admit it all. Where we say what we can’t say to our friends at the playground. To our neighbors at a backyard barbecue. Where we coddle the voice that sits within. The one that whines in frustration at all the chores and the failures. The deeds undone. The lives we don’t have. But we want. The people we see inside ourselves. But can’t always become. This is the place where we try not to portray ourselves as someone in particular. We place no judgment. We find no fear. We look for resolve. This is […]

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Sarah writes

October 18, 2009

Give yourself away

When I was in high school I had a favorite teacher. She would have us freewrite. It was liberating for me. I didn’t understand why some of my classmates would groan. We were given a topic and ten minutes. Our pens were instructed to flow freely and effortlessly and consistently for 10 minutes. And I say “our pens” because they really take on a life of their own when you let your mind just go. I don’t think I ever realized it until now but it was like a meditation. A release of the thoughts. Maybe that’s why I enjoyed […]

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September 24, 2009

I am tired of talking

I am always talking. Words are always coming out of my mouth. I would say that about 5% of the time I am actually saying the things I want to be saying. The other 95% of the time I am either saying the things that need to be said or saying things that will fill the air. I say things at work to fill the air. To bring laughter. Shock and laughter. It feels good to hear this laughter when everything else about my job is really just NOT funny. I say things to friends to fill the air. To […]

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August 31, 2009

I’ll put it on the schedule

It’s taken me seven years of parenthood to see that I’m better when I’m busy. And I am. I love my kids more. More? Yes, More. I work full-time. Monday through Friday. I exhaust myself by showering and dressing and drying my hair. By choosing just how presentable I’m going to look at the office today. By fitting all my wants and needs around this uncompromising schedule that ties me to a desk, and a computer, and a phone, and a money-making lifestyle. (Not much money, mind you. Don’t get the wrong idea.) I have a calendar on the kitchen […]

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August 23, 2009

Seven Pictures for my Seven Year Old

I’m not prone to sadness about my kid growing up, but I’m getting a bit teary tonight. Typical of the first child, I pushed Jamis to walk, to talk, to the potty, and then off to school. And now I want to stop the clock. He’s gotten too old. I could use a rewind. To turn back the time. To hold him again – his whole body fitting within my body. Happy Number Seven biggest boy. You saved my life. And gave me a new life. And it’s a beautiful place to be. Tweet

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August 22, 2009

30 Years Between Them

Here they are. The birthday duo. Their first encounter. 2002 That year we began a journey. As sisters. And then as mothers. And here we are. We have arrived. Happy Birthday Sister. I love you. Tweet

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Jen and Sarah writes

June 12, 2009

Bad Mothers, Good Mothers, Really?

Today’s post started as a comment to the article Just Sayin’ – Is “bad” parenting in? I heard it in the car on the way to work and immediately called Jen, who should have been in the car, on the way to work, and she was, but she didn’t answer the phone because she was in the dead zone (topic for an entirely different post). I hate it when she’s in the dead zone and so I left a message. And here we are now, hours later and thinking about this article and all that it means, how it can […]

6 comments

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Sarah writes

June 9, 2009

Summer, here we come

I’m happy for the sun-soaked, sunscreen-soaked days that lay ahead. I welcome them. And I’ll even deal with whiney toddlers who yell at me to “Stop!” Because summer breathes on me calm and slow and patient thoughts. And I can always use more of those. So summer, here we come. The boys are a year older, and life is even louder, and there’s sure to be more of this… Tweet

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June 8, 2009

Sleeping Boys

Exhaustion. Me. No words. Just thoughts. Of little boys. Sweet. and Quiet. When they sleep. Ahh, me. My boys. And sleep. Tweet

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I started an email response to Shawna, who commented on my last post, Thinking Out Loud. The email got so long and so intense that even though I continued writing, I had decided to post it on the blog as a direct reply to Shawna’s comment – because sometimes it’s just strange to privately respond to people we don’t know with so much information and so much honesty (even though that’s what we do in a blog post – weird) and I didn’t want to freak Shawna out. And because I was sharing such a significant expansion of the previous […]

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Read More in Sarah Writes

Sarah writes

May 15, 2009

A hug is where the heart is

I can’t stop thinking about this face. And how it’s lips can charm me and scorch me all in a matter of minutes. _______________________________________ Scenario: Jamis asks for a hug.I’m bein’ a lil’ bit goofy and flop on top of him. Arrrrrrg! “There’s your huggy hug.” “No, a real hug.” So I sit up properly on the couch and he folds into my arms. Actually, I think we’re at the point where I fold into him, because the hugs are less frequent and he tends to offer them not only when he needs one, but when he knows I need […]

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Sarah writes

May 11, 2009

Post Mother’s Day Post

I know, enough about Mother’s Day already. I just have some things to say and I think that if I don’t, I’ll forget. And I can’t. I can’t forget; I need to have a place to come back to when it’s time to remember. I’ve been lucky enough to celebrate six Mother’s Days. None has ever been as special as this one. We did not go out for brunch. I did not wear a hat. It was just a day. My kids woke up. My husband asked if I’d like to sleep in and he’d bring me coffee. I said […]

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Read More in motherhood, Sarah Writes

I am so terrifically mad at my husband right now that I want to spit. I shouldn’t even be writing about this here. It’s not a place to give people the wrong impression that I live with a terrible person or something. That’s not the case, so please take it as only a moment in time, a moment in my mind that I absolutely must purge before it throws me down under where I can’t think of anything else, where I breathe anger, eat anger and cry anger. And please be kind enough to deal with the run-on sentences, as […]

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Read More in motherhood, Sarah Writes, three kids