Jen writes

January 6, 2012

A possible experiment

Less personal narrative. More fictional creations. What you just might find here (on Jen’s writing days) in 2012.

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Jen writes

November 12, 2011

On formative experiences, past and present.

A weekend of friends. A sunburn. Conversation. Camaraderie. Picture taking. A dinner. A brunch. A row. Reminiscing. Reunions can be fraught with the unknown. With vanity that rears its ugly head, pointing out my too-long, uncut hair. My unfit middle. My dry, blotchy skin and tired eyes. Vanity can hold me back, grip me in the chest. Make me want to be invisible. But you can’t have the full experience and be invisible. You have to risk being the most wrinkly, most tired-looking, most frazzled, nervous person in the room (or at the boathouse, as it were). You have to [...]

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Jen writes

August 12, 2011

Manuscript

The words come. The words go. There are better ones. Always better. Then, no, the first phrasing worked. Back to that. Yes. That. Good. And then, upon rereading the draft I realize. First person is better. Let’s not be omniscient. And so the revisions begin again. 1,000 words 2,000. Until the certainty. Omniscience. Yes. Back to the original draft. Confident That the voice is right now It was right all along. Sigh. The words they come. And go. And somehow add up. To 21,357. I commit to the goal: 75,000. I am almost (gasp!) one-third there.

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Jen writes

May 5, 2011

Wheels turning

I get in the car and start driving And my brain awakens to the ideas it’s been holding back Amidst the morning needs of getting out the door Helping to get others out the door. I drive and I think and my awakened synapses fire (is that the terminology? is that the science of it?) Ideas come from every direction demanding my attention And I try to keep my focus on the road Without losing sight of the creativity that sustains me That demands my time and my dedication and my patience The same needs that so often are taken [...]

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Jen writes

April 19, 2011

Seven years and nine months ago

I remember the positive test. And the resulting sweaty palms and inability to stand. I remember calling my sister, herself already mother to a 12-month-old. I remember the disbelief. The excitement. The absolute wonder. I remember formulating the words in my mind, “I’m pregnant.” I remember sitting in a cafe, looking around the room and thinking, “I wonder who else is pregnant.” I remember walking down the street, wondering if any other women had the same secret. I remember dwelling on this strange feeling that, although I’ve never been someone to reveal it all, there was this huge part of [...]

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Jen writes

February 20, 2011

Weathering the present

I have just about had enough of winter. On the eve of what is predicted to be a “quick storm,” resulting in four to six more inches of snow on our already blanketed yard, the magic of the glistening white branches is over for me. I want to be able to open my back door and send the kids outside without having to bundle them up or respond to snow up the sleeve, down the collar, in the boot. I want to be able to clean my house–yes, I just said that–without people underfoot everywhere I go (undoing my work [...]

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Jen writes

February 7, 2011

On this day …

John Deere is somewhat of a celebrity in our house. The tractor lust that started about the same time my son was able to sit upright and peer over the edge of his stroller continues to this day, six years later. So I shouldn’t have been surprised at the enthusiasm with which he announced over the weekend that John Deere’s birthday is February 7. That’s right, today. Apparently, B has been holding tight to this knowledge since a few days after Christmas, when he completed reading the John Deere biography given to him by Santa. I’m not sure what he [...]

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Jen writes

September 21, 2010

Getting ready to jump in.

I’ve been reading. A lot. Often. Almost constantly. Absorbing words, sentences, whole pages at a time. As if trying to make up for the lost reading time of having three children in four-and-a-half years. As if someone is going to come knocking on my door asking me to identify the latest debuts of the past several years. I’ve been reading and thinking and remembering how absolutely wonderful, how essential already-written words are to my life. Getting lost in stories. Pondering characters. Story structure. Plot. And considering how it all affects my own writing. Except. I haven’t been writing. I think [...]

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Jen writes

September 6, 2010

Reflections

This morning, I looked up from scrubbing the bathroom sink to catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror. Glasses slipping down my nose. Hair pulled back in a messy bun that highlighted my grey streak. I did a lot of housework today. It feels important to me that B go off to school tomorrow from a clean house. And so there I was, spray bottle in one hand and paper towel in the other, bent over the white pedestal sink wondering if the hardened peanut butter would ever come unglued from the faucet when, wait, there I was. In [...]

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Jen writes

June 25, 2010

Goals.

They used to be much bigger. Write novel. Have baby (or three). Now, to do dishes after dinner I feel achievement unlike any other. I want to strive for more.

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Jen writes

December 31, 2009

Blue Moon

Happy New Year. Happy New Decade. Happy 2010. There are a few more hours of 2009 in my place in the world, and I am anxious to ring in the New Year. The kids are in bed, and I just peeked outside at the full moon. The second this month. How perfect. How rare. A blue moon on New Year’s Eve. To me this means second chances. Renewal. It means there are good things in store in the coming year. Things that rarely have happened before in my life. Better things. Even mystical things. Tonight, I am crossing the threshold [...]

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